The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility
by mikeretamar
Summary: Peter's just been invited to become the newest Avenger after defeating Kraven, The Chameleon, and the Hob Goblin in one go! He's got Mary Jane Watson and Aunt May by his side, what more could a 17-year-old superhero ask for? Maybe a new suit, thanks to an alien black goo! How will this new goo affect the psyches of Peter Parker and Spider-Man, all while starting his senior year?
1. Chapter 1

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 1: Saturday September 1st**

"Peter Parker, are you ready to assemble with the Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes?", Iron Man asked a healing Peter Parker. "No! No no no no no no no no! You will NOT make my only nephew some little poster boy for whatever Young Avengers Internship you supers are launching any time soon!", Aunt May replied. "She's right, Mr Iron Man. I can't be some poster boy or a reserve Avenger you use for clout", Peter added. "I gotta be a real Avenger!" "You what?!" "Done, Spider-Man is now the 7th Avenger." "Peter, what the shit are you doing?!", MJ and May simultaneously yelled at Peter.

"Baby, I don't want you getting your ass handed to you by Dr Doom or Ultron or some other wack-a-doo", MJ added in a concerned matter. "Baby?", May replied. "D-d-Dr Doom?", Peter stammers. "Ultron?", Iron Man and Captain America shuddered. "Oh God no, you're not going to fight a major threat like that", Captain America replied. "At least not yet, it's far too early to get you fighting someone massive like that, son."

"Also there's no real news about them currently, ya big dummy", Iron Man replied. May lets out a sigh of slight relief. "This is all big news to us that we're on your radar—" "And so sudden!", MJ retorted."Yeah, so sudden. But why now, and why him?" "We believe that a hero who's bounced back from such a traumatic experience is Avengers material, straight and simply put", Cap replied.

"We can allow him access to the best facilities, the widest net of heroes to support him mentally, physically and financially, as well as provide a much needed image fixer." "What do ya mean, 'image fixer' ?", Peter sternly asks. "After all those months of bad press down at the Bugle, AND with the recent death of J Jonah Jameson due to your villains, not everyone is in love with you." "But he printed pro-Qanon, Skrull politicians in DC and flat earth theories on the same page as my 'bad press'! The Bugle's a fake paper, that's why they're transitioning to TV! At least there people won't care about fake news."

"We believe all media outlets of that scale are 100% legitimate, but that's a conversation for another day, Parker", Iron Man added. "Just like your 'Armor for All' initiative a few years back, Stark?",MJ bitterly asks Iron Man. "Wow, you're sassy! Why don't you go pick up some notebooks for school on Tuesday, how about that?" "Who are you calling sassy?", Peter interrupted. "Why don't you give Peter his first mission—I*mean*coffee*run—already?" "I think it's time you supers leave", May sternly ended the Iron Man/MJ tussle.

Iron Man and Cap walk out of the hospital room, bringing this sense of superiority with them. "One last thing, Parker", Cap calmly said. "The swearing-in ceremony is at Central Park at noon, Monday. It'll be easy to spot us, son." The door slams as Peter's girlfriend and aunt give these Avengers a vengeful stare. "So, do they know that I'm a really fast healer and that I don't need this hospital room anymore?"

**END OF CHAPTER 1**


	2. Chapter 2

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 2: Sunday September 2nd**

"Thanks, May, for making sure I stay on budget for my school supplies", Peter happily told May. "Well, you had a Reed Richards budget; you just had to figure out how much lunch money you want to start the year off with", she replied. "I guess you're right there, but you especially helped out with the surprise!" "What surprise, Pete?" "The surprise for MJ, May! The little necklace for her to wear on the first day!" "Petey, you shouldn't have!" MJ says as she walks into the house, holding shopping bags of indiscriminate stuff.

"MJ! I thought you were gonna come by later for dinner", Peter surprisingly notices. "I got a little surprise for you too, Tiger. But not for ya first day of school. So close your eyes first." "Mary Jane, what did you do for my little Peter?", May asked, holding her hand against her hip. "I can't get you a Fantasicar or a Cerebro. However, I can get you something just as good! Stick out your hands and open your eyes." She then places a big, black box inside the palm of Peter's hands.

"What is it?", Peter asks. "Open it, silly!" He opens it to reveal a folded piece of paper, with a Spider-Man logo sticker holding it together. A pair of Broadway tickets and bowtie lay inside. "Woah! You got tickets to Washington?! But how? I thought that show was impossible to get into", Peter exclaimed in a flabbergasted matter.

"When one of your runway friends doubles as a weekend extra, the impossible becomes very possible. Now go put on that Hawaiian shirt from last week, Tiger, and let's have a REAL date!" "You mean now?" "Yeah, ya ding dang ole dingle dangle! Sorry if I'm taking him from your Sunday dinner, May, but I can't not treat him if I can."

"…No hanky panky there, both of ya! You're both teens, not adults at the end of the day. And Peter, remember you gotta come back early for tomorrow's Avengers ceremony; if you still insist on doing it", May dryly replies. "We will, May. I'll drag him over here myself if he gets too slick!", MJ replies as the two head out towards the Great White Way. "Ben, I swear, you would love little Mary Jane if you could see her now!", May gleefully whispers as she looks out towards her kitchen window.

As this hot New York afternoon transformed into a cool, crisp Manhattan night, MJ and Peter's dinner and a show date had come to its end. "Well, Tiger, what'd you think of my little late-night surprise?", an excited MJ asks Peter on the train ride home. "The only thing 'little' about you is—" "Don't even finish it if you know what's good for your social life." "—is your limits for generosity!" "Better! Glad you liked it, and I'm especially glad that Spidey got to stop that crazy shooter before shit could have gotten ugly." "When duty calls, duty calls. I'm just glad no one got hurt, from what I could see." "For now, yeah. Washington was pretty good, too!" "Surprisingly good. Who would've thought that not even gunfire would make them break character?"

"It sucks that we couldn't see the whole show, tho", Peter sighed. "Luckily, tho, Spider-Man can accept rain check tickets as a thank you for stopping terrorists." "Tiger Cub, you sly, sly boy!" "I guess that Parker luck can help out every once in a while." MJ gives Peter a quick, yet powerful, kiss on the cheek.

**END OF CHAPTER 2**


	3. Chapter 3: Labor Day

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 3: Monday September 3rd/Labor Day**

"So should I wear the button down or just MJ's bowtie on the Spider-Suit?", Peter frantically asks May. "Just the bowtie, the top'll make you look like a Superhero World waiter. Ya gotta look better than Thor for your big ceremony!" "But I thought the button down wasn't returnable because it was—" "We'll find a different time to wear it, maybe for Ben's birthday dinner." A sudden silence filled the air. "… yeah, I can wear it there. Anyway, you want me to go on my own there, text you where it is or do you and MJ want to go with me?"

"No, you go ahead, me and Mary Jane will follow the news trucks around Central Park. Plus, I Googled up some stuff about their special events in the city." "You did? What'd ya find?" "They have a knack for throwing parties at Belvedere Castle." "I'll check that out and call the both of you, in case you're reading another Bugle Sound-Off!", Peter replies as he swings out of the kitchen window, his mask covering all but his mouth biting a cold pepperoni slice. "You used to work for them, smart ass."

As he swings from Forest Hills to Manhattan's Museum Mile, Peter sees a large crowd head towards Turtle Pond. "Well, May was right for once. Actually, she's always right, except for me not being an Avenger", Peter ponders inside his head, swinging between the tree branches. "I can finally BE someone, someone that can protect them and the city. Someone that can't be hunted down or hurt, someone MJ can love better than anyone could ask for! Now why wouldn't I want to be that?" Landing on the roof of the Delacorte Theater, Peter immediately gets more than his fair share of cameras and reporters.

"Spider-Man, can you confirm and/or deny that you will fight on Avengers missions abroad?", asked a Spectrum News reporter. "Can't you wait 'till the ceremony actually starts?" "Spider-Man! Eddie Brock, CNN! Will you be using Stark enhanced tech, now that you'll be the 7th Avenger?" "No comment, wait for the show to star—" "Spider-Man, Betty Brant, DBNR! Can you tell us whether you'll be taking orders from SHIELD or the Avengers themselves?" "Again, no comment! And good to see you back on the field, Betty", Peter replies in an almost flirtatious matter, swinging off into the trees above the Turtle Pond pier. Reporters from all over the media circuit try to track his movement in the trees, but he loses them quite easily as he catches his breath before the big show.

Roughly a half hour later, the Avengers logo can be seen plastered above a small stage, facing the water of Belvedere Castle on this extra sunny Labor Day. "Spider-Man, do you swear to answer the call whenever the Avengers assemble in your town?", asked a stoic Captain America. "I do, sir." "Do you swear to help out any and all citizens in mortal danger, regardless of how dangerous our villains may be?" "Sir, yes sir." "Do you swear to serve as an inspiration to men, women and children all over the world?" "I do, sir." "Then you are an Avenger, Spider-Man. Go ahead and make the call, son."

"Well, if you say so, Cap. …**AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!**" Immediately after Peter calls for his new teammates, Iron Man slams into the stage, fist first. The Hulk roars a pathway for him to sprint in and jump onto the stage. Thor gracefully rockets right next to Cap, as the Ant-Man and Wasp fly in on dragonflies, growing right in front of Spidey's eyes.

"When you guys say Avengers Assemble, you really assemble!", muttered Spider-Man, hoping no one would hear him. "Ay verily, Man of Spiders! Tis why we summon ourselves in such a manner", replies Thor. "Hulk hungry, say cheese for puny camera people already!", yells a disgruntled Hulk. As the cameramen take pictures of the new Avengers team, a large, unmarked white van crashes into the ceremony crowd. "Stark, where are you, ya war mongering mother fucker?!", bellows a portly, armored and masked mad man. "You can't live a life of freedom if your weapons and stupid suits take that away from the rest of the world!"

"Hulk, do what you always do", Cap sternly ordered. As the green goliath steamrolls towards the portly terrorist, the madman creates an organic forcefield around himself. "I don't want to fight any Avenger except the armored one", the portly man calmly stated. "You're wrong and you know it, Stark! Mutants are here, they're here to stay, and we'll inherit the Earth by any means necessary", he monologues while opening the trunk of his van. Inside the van lies a child-sized meteor, smoking from the pores of its rocky exterior. "Go get him, my little Kinder egg from outer space." The portly terrorist then slams his force-field enabled fist into the dead center of the meteor, cracking it open and releasing slime-like goo of varying shapes and colors.

As the goo creatures are unleashed upon an innocent crowd and not-so-innocent heroes, Captain America's shield slashes through these new liquid threats. "Contain the fighting inward as much as possible, Spider-Man!", Cap barks. "These,.. things, I don't know how they fight, so keep it tight enough that we always have the upper hand. They can't be as bad as HYDRA, they don't even have a face!"

Ant-Man launches small red pills at each goo, releasing cages that entrap them. The Wasp flies above the crowd, crop dusting the goo creatures with more shrunken down containment cages. Thor and Hulk punch their way to glory, weakening the goo's strength.

Cap and Iron Man strategize a "slice and atom splice 'em" plan to handle this strange, sticky threat. Spider-Man, feeling confident that the civilians are now out of harm's way, finally rose up to the challenge of fighting alongside The Avengers. "Hey, Cap! Looks like everyone's gonna be able to report another day, how many of these things are left to take care of?", Peter asked. "There's maybe two or three left, if what Ant-Man told me is correct, Spider-Man. Just contain them with Ant-Man's tech", Cap replied. "Go find Ant-Man and get the last of the cages." Spidey, now with a mission, swings off to finish the job.

"Ant-Man, where you at? I need some of those little red pills, bro! Bro, where are you?", Peter asks with purpose in his voice. "You didn't shrink into infinity, did ya? Where are you, man; this isn't funny anymore!" His Spider-Sense soon flares up like a bomb as a large, slick, oil-black goo encases the web-slinger in a slimy cocoon. He tries to first wiggle, then wrestle and lastly web his way out of the menacing goo, failing each time. The goo begins to truly entrap Peter. "Get out of my body! Get out get out get out!" The goo then creates a bubble around Peter and a nearby tree, with Peter's increasingly louder screams silenced like pressing a mute button. The goo then crawls up Peter's body, granting him a new outfit with a slick black, organic design and white chest spider.

"W-w-What's this? What did you do to me?", Peter asks the goo. One last blood red goo can be seen, eating a paparazzo hiding in the bushes. He instinctively strikes his iconic, two-fingered webbing pose, yet on his left hand, the goo extends itself and grabs the last of the goo like a tentacle, gripping its prey. It then uses Peter's right hand to grapple a tree branch, swing up, grab another, and so on until landing at the Avengers stage. "Show your identity right now, or die", Iron Man asserts as his left arm charges up for a powerful energy blast. "Relax guys, it's me, Spider-Man! The goo helped me capture one of the others. It was eating a dude alive, but I think this guy's an ally." The goo then slides up and off of Peter, resting on his left shoulder like a liquid cape.

"…Kid, what the hell do you think you're doing calling these 'things' an ally?", asks Ant-Man. "And where's the red one?" The black goo spits out the red, murderous, slimy creature. Its weakened status was apparent, as it could barely crawl half a foot towards Ant-Man without tiring out. The smallest Avenger did't care, as he quickly entrapped it in the last of his red pill cages. "Now, I know you're a bit younger than our usual teammates, so I'm only gonna say this nicely once: give me the black goo, too. Give it now, please." "But why, if he's helping—" "Don't call IT 'he', or anything other than an it! It's alive, it's not something I've ever seen on this planet, and it's a possible danger to you and everything we know just like those damn dirty Iraqis back in '02! Now cough it up, ROOKIE."

"Hank, calm down", Wasp begged her increasingly angered husband, hoping to keep him in-check. "He's just a kid from Queens, like he knows what—" "SHUT YOUR MOUTH FORE I SHUT IT FOR YA, JAN!", Hank replies, shaking the back of his right hand quite close to her cheeks. "NOW GIVE ME THE DAMN GOO, YA LITTLE SHIT!" A startlingly shaken Peter lifts his left arm, signaling for the goo to give itself up to a fully enraged Ant-Man. "Fucking dumb ass kid, can't even help but befriend the damn enemy. Just like your generation to switch sides the same way you switch and flip-flop ya genders", Hank mutters to himself as he mounts a dragonfly back to Avengers Mansion. A crying, humiliated Wasp flies behind her bitter lover in tears and shame. "Hank, get back here now. We need a serious discussion about manners again", Cap demands in his comm link, chasing that very dragonfly down like a HYDRA tank. Thor and Hulk, changing into Bruce Banner, a mild-mannered gamma specialist, follow suit.

"I think you should head over to the Mansion for last-minute paperwork on Friday. At least then we'll have talked some sense back into Hank, Peter", Iron Man politely asks this very scared boy. "He's just,… Well, not everyone has the morals of Steve Rogers, Pete. Sorry this has to be the way you find out." Iron Man then blasts off back to his mansion/super-powered office, leaving behind a spider of a man.

"I know, Mr Iron Man. I know not everyone's what you think they are", Peter whispers to himself, swinging out of the now inactive crime scene and somberly reminiscing over Harry Osborn.

**END OF CHAPTER 3**


	4. Chapter 4

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 4: Tuesday September 4th**

"Prisoner 33250689, get up. Your transfer time starts now", barks a jaded corrections officer. "Is it really time to go to The Raft already?", asks a sleepy Harry Osborn. "Could've sworn it was tomorrow." "Yeah, and I could've sworn you killed kids so you could kill Spider-Man. Get up, punk!" "Alright, I'm up I'm up."

As Harry is the upon last to enter the prisoner transfer ferry, many bitter criminals stare menacingly at this young super villain. The ride to The Raft is a slow, yet steamy ride as the young man is faced with taunts and threats of truly criminal intent. Some range from a simple shank promise, a "don't drop ya soap, cutie", all the way up to "I'm gonna turn the Hob Goblin into Kermit the Frog". He became the biggest name to check into The Raft ever since Armin Zola.

As he is dragged into the dirty cell hallways, hollers and spit are flung towards the young orphan. "Only I get to kill Spider-Man, asshole! Don't take that shit away from me", yelled a belligerent inmate. "What a buffoon; you can't even be a good Goblin like ya dad!", shouted another. "You get an hour max with lunch and yard time, half hour of media time, and two mandatory hours in the library as a substitute for school lessons. We don't consider you a kid, but you knew that back in the courtroom", his state-assigned lawyer humorously stammered. "However, because the cells are expensive to maintain, everyone shares a cell unless their super powers granted through birth and/or experimentation—" "I know, I know; just let me die in here already. These fuckfaces are gonna make sure I won't survive my first week here." "Alright. Just remember, I warned you", the lawyer replied, leaving Harry's table in the break room.

"Now stay there, ya rotten kid! If I see you move an inch I don't like, you're getting an extra year—" "An extra year on a life sentence? C'mon, make me scared, asshole." "Transfer time, Octavius!", yelled a distant CO. "Where's he headed, Kowalski?", asked Harry's CO. "Cell block 4D." "Bring him here, let's show Mr Big Shot here exactly how we treat celebrity killers!" "Yo, is that..?" "It is, and he thinks he's hot shit!" "You can't threaten me—" "We can't threaten you, huh, little boy? Doc Flop over there is gonna tell you EVERYTHING we did to him; ain't ya, mop-head?" A small grunt of anger confirmed the officer's taunts had affected him for the worse, as his large, ominous silhouette wiggles with a smooth, metallic clinking and clanking on either side of his physique.

"Enough talk from you, blabber-mouth. You two sit tight or I find a legal way to kill you dead", the second officer retorted before slamming the vibranium bars in their faces. "Lights out, fuckers! If we hear anything, you won't hear anything again", blares a faulty speaker poking out of the ceiling.

"…No, no no no no no. You, y-y-you're—" "Yes, Mr Harry Osborn. I am the Doctor Otto Octavius, better known to your world as Doctor Octopus", Otto replied, showing off his four tentacles; with each pair tripled chained down and weighted towards but not tied to the ground. "How did you know my na—" "Your father spoke very low of you. Also, word of mouth in prison is vast and ever flowing." "You knew Dad before or after—" "Both. First as a consultant, then as a team recruiter. He was a genius, but far too egotistical. Shame what happened to him, how he thought the Spider Sense would fail that day."

"Wait a minute. If you know how deep his powers go, why are you here? Why didn't you win?" "I miscalculated his spirit, not his strength. No matter who you threaten, no matter how heavy the trap is, the spirit will win. I made him learn pain, however. His uncle may not have deserved to die at the hands of an up-and-coming hitman, but Peter had to learn his powers had to be handled responsibly." "You WHAT?! He was my uncle just as much as Peter, he helped me realize how I could learn to tolerate my father! Who do you—" The left pair of tentacles slap Harry's face with a heaviness he hadn't felt Norman ever give him.

"He wanted to be a wrestler, a man of fame and fortune, a fool", Otto added to his monologue. "No one with such power should EVER waste their potential on something as useless in the real world as an entertainer! I had to teach him the hard way what happens when you waste potential. Then he learned how to not waste his powers, and decided to get involved in my greatness. I only robbed banks to fund my experiments at first, and then I made connections in the underground community, allowing me to work there for higher wages even Tony Stark would pay. Why wouldn't I stay with these morally gray fellows?"

"Because they kill and terrorize for fun! I wanted to kill him for a purpose, I had to—" "You were petty. You're not a man, and never were; never will be. You're a boy who wanted revenge for Daddy's acceptance down in Hell." "You don't GET to talk about my fat—" Otto slaps Harry with both pairs of his restrained tentacles. "I will speak of who I want when I want. I broke the Spider-Man harder than anyone can say they have or will. I want to break him again, as he fails to realize that he is a boy who will not live up to his potential."

"Dad made him retire for a month. You made him want to kick your ass harder, and now he's got a girlfriend, you dip!" Otto, realizing he's not nearly the villain he remembers himself to be during his active years, simply snaps. "He has a what? Why?" "She's Mary Jane Watson, hot redhead who REALLY likes Peter and that damn Spider-Man too. She's the best of both worlds." "…Can you point her out in a crowd, accurately?"

"Yeah, I kidnapped her. Ya tend to remember the face of a girl you kidnap." "Excellent, boy. We'll need that for later." "Why later?" "I may be Doctor Octopus, but I came to the Raft as The Master Planner. You and I will make sure the Spider-Man remembers the two who hurt him once more." Otto begins to subtly chuckle menacingly, with Harry nervously laughing alongside him, in fear of getting slapped again. Otto then laughs in an evil tone, as Harry laughs loudly. The two now maniacally cackle like the absolute madmen they are, ready to strike down the Spider-Man at a moment's notice.

**END OF CHAPTER 4**


	5. Chapter 5

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 5: Wednesday September 5th**

"So, Mr Parker, if I'm correct, can you define for the class what the five super-powered government branches are?", asked Mr Bagley, Peter and MJ's new Supers History teacher. "SHIELD, SWORD, Department of Mutant Power Registry, Bureau of Super-Powered Humans, and…" "It's a trick question, those are the only four branches!", MJ added in defense of her tiger cub. "Yes and no, Ms…" "Watson. Mary Jane Watson." "Ms Watson, there was also the now-defunct Department of Sentinel Mutant Neutralization. But that was beyond your time, and just beyond mine. The 70s and early 80s were a boom time for mutant discrimination. Does anyone here happen to know a mutant affected by the SMN program?" "Mr Bagley, I know someone who was!", replied a teen all the way in the back, hiding under his hoodie.

"You mind telling us, uh… mystery student?" "Name's Randy Robertson. My grandpa was taken by those giant purple robots back in '72. Shit was printed in the Bugle front page; you know it, the photo where those metal henchmen are grabbing niggas with powers like him right out their own apartment buildings and houses in Harlem. So yeah, I know someone who was affected." "…That's some powerful stuff, Mr Robertson. Very harsh language, but I'll let it slide since it's quite the tale."

Once the class was over, most of the teens left off to find their new courses. MJ and Peter, however, wanted to talk to a fellow classmate. "Randy, that's your name, right?", Peter asks. "Yeah, what do ya want?" "I wanted to say hi. I used to intern down at the Bugle during the summer, before…" "Before it got downsized to a TV show?" "Yeah, I was the photographer for Spider-Man—" "Wait wait wait. You were Spider-Man's photographer?" "Yeah. I used to hand over my photos to either Jonah or your dad, Robbie." "Oh yeah! Dad used to talk about you all summer long, said ya came in looking like you climbed those walls with Spidey himself!"

"My tiger being an absolute mess? Sounds about right", MJ sassily replies. "She ya girl, 'tiger'?" "I'm not his girl; he's my boy", she replied, firmly hugging Peter. "My big, bad tiger cub boy." "Yo, is she one of those furry chicks or something?", a confused, concerned Randy whispered to Peter. "You wish. MJ's just the best", he replied, slowly choking from her bear grip on him. "Speaking of the best, you two wanna take me to the nearest N train? I got a lot of second day of school homework to finish." Suddenly, Peter's phone got an Avengers Alert, summoning him to the Mansion at once.

"C'mon, you can finish that on the subway platform no problem!", Peter stated. "Why not head on back to the West Village one last time, before summer's really over?" "My guy, you're in high school right now. Summer's very much over", added Randy. "It's not over till the 21st, as per basic science", the young couple simultaneously replied. "Wow, where did you two meet; Nerd Nexus?", Randy sarcastically replied, shocked at the couple's chemistry.

"It's a long story", Peter answers. "You see, way back in the day—" "Kindergarten. We've been friends since kindergarten", MJ adds. "Anyway, you wanna go back down to the West Village or no? I may or may not have a surprise for the two of ya there." "Pete, it's work calling you, isn't it?" "Yeah, it's work. They're calling me in early." "Wait, where you working at now that the Bugle is just a TV show?" "…It's a Stark Industries part-time job, I'm gonna see if that'll count as my internship class." "Nice. Good luck with that, Tig—" "Randy, you wanna walk me to the train? I don't trust these new kids, and Pete takes a different train than me", MJ interrupts Randy's not-so-subtle teasing.

"I don't wanna cross any lines. Peter, you mind?" "She asked you, not me. You wanna walk her back while I go to work?" "If you say so, Pete. Good luck at work", Randy states, barely agreeing to this situation. "C'mon, I'll show ya the way to the N, Paper Boy!", MJ whimsically says to Randy, inviting and dragging him to walk away as Peter needs to change into his Spider-Suit.

Soon after that talk, Spider-Man can be seen swinging across the Queensboro Bridge on his way to Avengers Tower. "Hey guys, what's up?", Peter states, greeting Iron Man and Hank Pym on the Helipad. "I, uh.. we got a lot to talk about, and not all of it's good", Hank replied, with a small stutter in his throat. "There's some serious shit going on inside that tube of goo", Reed Richards added, walking outside to greet Peter. "Reed? How bad is it?"

"So this alien creature is alive, and although I can't trace its planet of origin, I can classify it as a symbiotic slime", Reed informs Peter matter-of-factly, holding the metal tube with the goo. "Wait wait wait, 'symbiote'? You mean that thing is gonna control me?!" "Not exactly", Hank replied. "It's not a very intelligent creature, it only has basic survival instincts." "This alien does have the potential to enter its host's mind, and have full control over the body rather than the usual 'I'll eat my host and move on to the next' behaviors of a symbiotic creature", Reed adds. "There's serious potential for a boost in intelligence and danger."

"So what do we do with it?", asks a concerned Peter, getting only more and more scared of it. "We aren't sure how to kill it, as fire, molecular separation, and even lethal gas doesn't affect it in any negative way whatsoever. For now, I'll keep it and store it in—" "No you won't, Reed; that's Avengers and SHIELD property", Hank sternly replied. "We fought it, we trapped and studied it here, we keep it in our facilities. So, cough it up, Stretch." "Hey, only Ben can call him that, TINY!", Peter yells at Hank, already sensing a mid-level Spider Sense blare. "You stay out of the grown-up conversations, kid! Reed here is breaking a law—" "That's my friend you're disrespecting, and doesn't the Baxter Building have free-range SHIELD permits?" "…Thank you for that, Spider-Man. I do have Level 9 SHIELD access to any and all super-related items." "Don't care, I don't think you're smart enough to handle this—" "Were you deemed Scientist Supreme of Earth, Hank? Were you? I don't remember The Watcher making you that", Reed asked in an extremely rude, almost disdaining tone towards his fellow super and super-scientist.

"Guys, guys, let's calm down for a minute here", Cap calmly negotiated, rushing in to put out this heated disagreement. "Nuh-uh, Stars and Stripes! Stretch here needs to remember who owns that damn goo", replies a very heated Ant-Man. "I said only Ben can call him Stretch, Tiny!", Peter repeats in a much angrier manner, this time pushing Hank Pym to the ground."Oh, you think I'm just a tiny dude, huh, kid? I'll show you who's tiny!", Hank replied, growing to a height of 30 feet. "**AVENGERS ASSEMBLE**!", Cap shouts at the top of his lungs, throwing his iconic shield at Hank's Pym Particles belt. Iron Man flies in, holding down Reed and Hulk jumps in, holding down Peter.

"Now listen once and only once, you brainiacs!", Cap bellows. "Reed gets to hold the creature, because I know for a fact he contributed more than we can thank him for in terms of scientific research. Now, apologize to Reed, Hank, and apologize to Spider-Man again for him having to see us like children!" "…My bad, Reed. I don't know what got into me there. Take the goo for as long as you need." Hank shrank back to his normal height, walking away in shame. "Don't walk away from this yet, Pym! You still owe apologies to our newest member here", Iron Man yells within his metal helmet. "Fuck that kid, let him learn some respect first."

As the tense afternoon at Avengers Mansion simmers into a late, brisk night inside the labs of the Baxter Building, Reed Richards can be seen experimenting one last theory with the black goo. "Reed, come to bed already, it's almost midnight", Sue begs her persistent husband. "Let me squeeze it one more half square foot of space; I want to see if lack of oxygen can end this very real threat", Reed replies, sounding half asleep. Through his sleep-deprived testing, the containment cage cracks slightly, with our goo creature sliding out towards freedom. "Sue, force field it now! It's symbiotic!", Reed orders, now with authority and alertness encompassing his voice. The slimy alien slithers out of its cage and underneath Sue, desperately trying to find a window in this giant laboratory. After a quick crawl through the Richards' lab and living room, it clings onto the window and forces it open. "Who put the AC on ten here?", asks a bewildered Ben Grimm, wearing a VR helmet.

"Close the window, Ben! Close it!", replies a scared Sue, preparing a force field outside the window. Ben sprints towards the open window, closing it with all his stone-layered might. Although Ben shut the window proper, the goo escaped the force field by half an inch. "Where is it?", asks a frantic Reed, holding a new, stronger metal tube. "Where'd it go?" "…Honey, we tried our best, but.." "It's gone, isn't it?" "What's gone, Stretch?" "That alien slime Peter encountered back at the Avengers ceremony. It's a living creature that got loose, Ben. It's now somewhere in this city, and—" "Slim, can't ya track its radiation or use some other fancy schmancy science GPS type thing to find it?" "…Give me five minutes." "What's with all the noise, I'm trying to sleep here?!", groggily yells Johnny Storm.

As this wanted slime ball scatters across the boroughs, it clings onto the N train towards Forest Hills. Sniffing and careful tracking leads the goo to an unsuspecting house, where Peter Parker sleeps blissfully unaware of the impending danger. The goo soon opens the window, slinks into Peter's bed, and bonds once more to Peter.

**END OF CHAPTER 5**


	6. Chapter 6

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 6: Thursday September 6th**

**New York Police Department Criminal Investigations Report #ASM300588**

**Officer In Charge of Investigation: Daniel O'Brady**

**Time of Activity: 1:19 AM**

**Report/Notes of Importance:**

An Asian, overweight male suspect had been approaching an older Caucasian gentleman, leaving a popular bar, Stan's Stout, on the corner of 25th and 9th. The suspect demanded the older gentleman give him everything his wallet held. Credit Cards, cash, IDs, the suspect demanded everything. The older man refused, and the suspect then pulled an unlicensed, loaded .45 caliber pistol, pointing it directly at the older man's head. Fearful for his life, the older gentleman screams "HELP! HELP! SOMEONE HELP ME!". The suspect then shoots a nearby trash can, proving this gun is loaded and he is not afraid to shoot this older man down. In response to these threats, the older man continues to scream for help. A male, muscular humanoid figure, doused in what appeared to be oil or black tar, jumps down between the two persons of interest. He had a large white spider on his chest and back, along with white, rounded out triangular eyes, looking possibly extra-terrestrial.

The armed gunman then switches his pistol aim from the older man to this new, strange being. He shot the creature in the head, with the figure not flinching or seemingly hurt in any shape or form. Now both the gunman and older man are terrified, albeit for different reasons. The third, black figure firmly grabs the suspect's left forearm, hairline fracturing that arm and throws the gunman towards the same trash can he had shot earlier. The gunman landed directly on his spine, breaking multiple spinal bones. The figure then "stretched its right arm", clung onto a nearby building rooftop, swung upward and towards 8th Ave. It never spoke, or acknowledged the existence of the older man.

**New York Police Department Criminal Investigations Report #WO54M7945**

**Officer In Charge of Investigation: Marcus Ramirez**

**Time of Activity: 2:28 AM**

**Report/Notes of Importance:**

An Eastern European, above-average height male suspect is exiting the popular mutant-friendly nightclub Scales, Tails and Ales on 56th St and Broadway. He is extremely intoxicated, and vomiting inside a public garbage can profusely on the corner of 57th and Broadway. In his drunken stupor, he walks up to different groups of young, attractive women in the hopes of having sexual relations with one, if not all, of them. One particular group of women had told him clearly multiple times they would not have any sexual relations with him, and the suspect soon became belligerent. He forcibly grabbed the heaviest woman, one of African-American descent, and hit her in the face with a glass beer bottle he had retrieved in the vomit filled garbage can. Suddenly, a lanky yet muscular, male humanoid figure made of black slime jumped in between the heavyset African-American woman and the drunken suspect. At first, the group of ladies were yelling foul, slurred obscenities at those not originally apart of their group.

The slime figure then proceeds to grab the head and right arm of the drunken suspect, and proceeds to crush the arm. Due to the extreme pain, the suspect lets go of the heavier woman and screams in agony very loudly. Bar patrons from around a three block radius exited the establishment to see what this screaming was all about. While holding onto his head, the black slime humanoid slams the suspect directly into the street sign lamppost of 57th St and Broadway. The group of women are now mortified at the intense, quick and public beating happening before their eyes, running inside a nearby pizzeria. The heavyset African-American woman, however, froze in trauma and watched the scene unfold in real time. She tried to ask the humanoid what its name was, or if it even could understand her. The figure made no comment, stared her down, and launched a gooey hook from the palm of its right hand towards the parallel stoplight, swinging its way towards Columbus Circle.

"These reports sound familiar enough to me, Reed", a concerned Hank Pym states. "So you agree that this is a confirmed appearance of that goo I lost control of?", replies a shameful Mr Fantastic. "Yeah, this is that damn goo I shouldn't have trusted you with, Stretch." "Please stop calling me Stretch, we're not that close." "I'll do what I want to do when it comes to failures, Richards. Now I'M gonna talk to Spider-Man—" "He has a real name, you know. I told you it so you could talk to him CALMLY." "Yeah, yeah, I'll 'politely' talk Penis Parker outta wearing that goo and retiring for good out of the superhero game. He stinks, and I don't like him!" "Jesus, Hank. What the hell happened to the bright, happy-go-lucky futurist I read about all those years ago?" "He became a founding Avenger and learned what the real world is, Reed. Not all of us can get donors for our goofy space missions, thinking we can use a wormhole to go to Mars—" "We could, we have, and I just couldn't figure out that last equation calculation and you know it!" "Cuz you're not the smartest man alive RIGHT NOW, Reed. I am", monologues a cocky, cruel Hank Pym hopping onto a nearby winged ant.

**END OF CHAPTER 6**


	7. Chapter 7

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 7: Friday September 7th**

"Peter, are you sure that mixingCGC and JRSR would create HLDBRG?", asks Ms Deodato, Peter and MJ's Chemistry teacher. "Absolutely! I read that textbook at least five times already, it's gotta work", Peter cockily replied. "Cool it, Tiger, you're showing off", MJ whispered. "It's not 'showing off' if you're right, it's just being right." The underpaid but extroverted teacher mixes these elements together, creating the class goal concoction. "Excellent work, Mr Parker! You definitely know your way around a beaker", praises the teacher. "Told ya, MJ", Peter replies, having a slightly snarky tone. "Don't matter if you're right, Tiger, you're acting like a know-it-all." "Now, class, if we can turn to page 299, we can start talking about venomous liquids."

After the final class bell rings, Peter and MJ walk off to their lockers and call it another school day. "Petey, what was up with you back in Chemistry? I don't remember you being that cocky in class back in the day or even Wednesday", MJ asks in a concerned, yet calm manner. "C'mon, that was nothing! I knew the answer, and I was right about it. I was just sure of myself, MJ, it's nothing." MJ doesn't budge on her stance, frowning a bit angrier than usual. "I'll try to be less of a dick next time, if that helps", Peter says in a condescending and somewhat reassuring matter. Suddenly, a ding from Peter's phone can be heard. "It's your friends in tights, isn't it?", asks MJ. "It is. You wanna come and hang out there this time? Think of it as my apology." "You already apologized, ya dingus. This is just for shits and giggles. Now let's swing over there, Tiger!"

Soon after, Spider-Man and MJ land on the Helipad. "Hey guys, what's up?", he exclaims, hoping to not have someone come out of nowhere. "Hey there, solider!", greets Cap, walking towards Spidey with Hank Pym. "Hank here has something to say to you; DON'T YOU, PYM?" "Yeah, it's about the goo. That thing is—" Cap then punches his shoulder, giving him a "wrong move" look only a mother could give. "What was it you really wanted to say, Hank?" "…I'm sorry for yelling at you and calling you a little shit, ya little shit." Cap then slaps the back of his head. "I'm sorry, that was uncalled for, and I might have judged you too harshly, too soon. You're an Avenger now, I have to treat you like one", Hank says while rubbing the back of his head. "Do you accept my apology?"

"Yeah, we're cool, man", Peter replies. "Now what were you saying about the goo?" "Wait, are you guys talking about the goo things from the Labor Day ceremony?", MJ asks. "Goo thing, and I think we found it. See, when Reed Richards took it away from us, he lost it like a dumbass and that thing was wandering the city like a slimy hobo." "Wait, that thing is somewhere in this city? Where, let's go get it! Tiger, go get it!" "MJ, calm down for a minute, let's hear where they think it is." "We don't think we know where it is. We know where it is, 'Tiger'. Right here, in this very hallway, wearing a red-and-blue set of webbed tights with a spider on his chest." "The fuck'd you say to me, Ant-Man?" "You're hiding the goo from us in plain sight. You're wearing that 'thing' under that suit, and you want to because you're nothing but a kid who does't understand how to be a hero!"

"Hank, stand down right now! We don't make inflammatory statements like that ever!", Cap argues. "Listen here, Bug Boy, you don't get to talk that hot shit about MY boyfriend—" "Boyfriend?! He's not your boyfriend; he's a crush, ya twelve-year-old. Go play with your Barbie dolls, will ya?" "Say that again, and I'll kick your tiny ass just like you tried to whoop The Wasp's ass, how about that?" "You don't get to talk about MY JAN, ya alien harborer!" "Don't talk about mine, and we'll be good, Tiny!" "You wanna do this again, pip-squeak?" "Hank Pym, stand down right now or so help me God, I will suspend you from the Avengers!" "Pip-squeak?! Who's the one that shrinks to the size of no one's favorite bug?" "Who's talking shit about me and my Hank?", adds a noticeably bruised Janet Van Dyne. "Tell ya man to stop harassing my Spider-Man, please!"

"**SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY BEFORE HULK SMASH ALL OF YOU PUNY WEAKLINGS**", bellowed a furious Bruce Banner, slamming both of his giant green fists between the arguing parties. Thanks to the Jade Giant, everyone starts to calm down and take a deep breath, choosing their next words carefully. "You're an above-average hero, not a real superhero, Spider-Child", Hank says while cocking his fists.

Falling for the bait, Peter immediately lunges at Hank, revealing the alien goo's new design for Spider-Man as they land a hard left uppercut. "I'm an Avenger, god damnit! You will fucking treat me as a fucking Avenger, you tiny fuck!", Peter rants as he lands punch after punch after punch on Ant-Man's now broken helmet. "Tiger, stop, that's enough!", MJ cries, seeing an Ant-Man that is visibly bloody and bruised already. "Tiger, that's enough already! He's done, he's done!" Hulk soon bear hugs Peter, separating the fight once more.

"He's not conscious, Peter", Cap replies while checking Hank for a pulse. "You beat a man to sleep today for no good reason, Mr Peter Parker. Does that feel good in your bones, Peter Parker?" "You know he kept talking shit and didn't expect to get flushed, right, MJ?" She stares at her boyfriend, shocked at this viciousness no matter how earned it was. "MJ, didn't he keep wanting me to fight him?… MJ?!" "Ye-yeah, he,.. he wanted to fight ya, Tiger Cub."

"I had hope in you, Peter Parker. Not Spider-Man, but Peter Parker. Reed and Sue said so many nice, intelligent and heart-warming things about you that we HAD to make you join our team, and now look. You nearly killed Ant-Man for what? Your pride? Some girl's pride?" "Pride?! If someone keeps disrespecting you on a personal level and tries to hit his girlfriend and be an all-around asshole, wouldn't you, Steve? Isn't that who you fought back at home in between HYDRA raids? Wouldn't you hit a monster square in the jaw?"

"Hank does what he believes is rig—" "Put me down, Banner. I'll swing my way home now", states a steaming Peter. "MJ, you're coming or no?" "She's not going anywhere with a brute like you,—" "Yeah, Tiger. You get me home faster than ANY ABOVE-AVERAGE HERO." The two kids in love swing up and away from the drama caused by their supposed new best friends in tights.

**END OF CHAPTER 7**


	8. Chapter 8

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 8: Saturday September 8th**

"You feeling good enough to talk about yesterday, Pete?', asks a doting Aunt May, cooking wheat cakes just the way her nephew likes. "I knew something bad happened over there from the way you didn't talk at all once you came home. Or was it school? Or Mary Jane? Or maybe even another girl you had you sig—" "I don't know if I wanna be an Avenger anymore, May", dryly replies Peter, walking down the stairs and into the kitchen. "They treat me like a pet, something that just has to do what they say because they say. And when I found something to help out, they take it from me and call me names and call MJ names and make me feel like real shit." "Peter! Language, but wow. What did you find that they took away from you, Petey?" "Remember on Labor Day, when those goo creature things were let outta that meteor?" "…yes, I do. You and your new friends trapped them, but never found the guy responsible for it." "Well, all of them are contained somewhere with a SHIELD logo on it except one." "Peter, what did you do, boy?" "Well, when I was fighting the goos and putting them in Ant-Man's traps, I found one, and.." "And…?" "And it helped me capture one and now I can look like this." Peter then reveals his oil-black design, white spider-symbol and all.

"Peter Benjamin Parker, what in the name of our Holy Lord and Savior is that?!", asks a shocked May, dropping her batter bowl right on the tiled kitchen floor. "It's the alien who helped me out! Do you like it?" "Peter, that's not of this Earth and I don't know what it'll do to you. Take it off, it is not cloth nor is it your friend! Let me see the face of my nephew, alien!" "C'mon, it's just a symbiote—" "SYMBIOTE, AS IN SYMBIOTIC CREATURE?! AS IN IT FEEDS OFF OF YOUR ENERGY JUST LIKE A PARASITE?!" "Yes, but I think I can train it, it designed this suit so it has intelligence of some kind! Give me a chance." "NO. TAKE IT BACK RIGHT NOW." "Let. Me. Try." "…I swear to God, Peter, you've given me so much fucking stress lately." "Language!"

Back at Avengers Mansion, Captain America and the teammates of Ant-Man have a serious discussion. "Can we go back to our lives already, I don't need a talking to like I'm a five year old?", Hank sarcastically asks. "No, Hank. You keep treating a fellow Avenger like garbage", Janet replies sternly. "You don't have to like Spider-Man, but you have to give him respect!" "Not if he allies with the enemy and calls me Pip-Squeak! He's a menace, just like the late J. Jonah Jameson said." "Look, Hank, the kid didn't do THAT much wrong. He's just a kid who's getting back on the super train. We gotta give Peter a chance."

"We did, and he failed miserably! He. Harbored. The enemy." "It was his first day, and like the kid's dealt with aliens before", Iron Man added. "Did you deal with aliens and a new team dynamic IN HIGH SCHOOL?" "HIGH SCHOOL?! I thought he was an eighth grader. Why the hell are we bringing him in anyway, if he's in high school? He can't even vote yet!", Hank replies, scoffing at the age of his supposed teammate. "If I were his dad, I'd give him a firm hand of manners—" "Like you did with me, Hank?", asks Janet. "No no, not like you, you dumb bitch. Worse." "Hank, now that I think about, we really have to talk about the way you treat Janet. And women. And everyone, really."

"I treat everyone with respect—" "If you hit anyone again, if you threaten anyone again, we will publicly remove you from the Avengers and make sure EVERYONE in the media knows what you're really doing. I'm sick and tires of paying off nurses and doctors about how Janet gets hurt each time. It's disgraceful, abusive and all around something Cap would murder you for if you weren't on the Top Ten Smartest Men Alive list", Tony Stark says, removing his helmet and staring Hank directly in his eyes, making sure the smallest Avenger fully understands this promise.

"Is this really how you guys feel? I'm a monster, but I'm too smart to lose?", asks a scared Ant-Man. "Yes, Hank, but you never listen", replies Janet. "You really think a girl like me wants to go outside and look pretty with a shiner the size of Thor's hammer?" "It's a grave problem, and I will beat your ass the next time you do it, now that Tony endorses me teaching you manners the way you should be taught", Cap adds into this tense talk. "Enough is enough, Hank. Fix yourself or we fix you", he concludes before walking away from the team. Suddenly, a whoosh of wind floods the room. "Thine Rainbow Bridge needed severe repairs. What have I missed, fellow Avengers?", asks an extremely late Thor.

**END OF CHAPTER 8**


	9. Chapter 9

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 9: Sunday September 9th**

Inside the grand mess halls of The Raft, chatter and gossip amongst the tables is served almost as much as the slop SHIELD calls food. Some permanent members, however, sit silently. "So, Osborn, you haven't gone crazy yet from Otto?", asks a burly, rugged individual. "No, muscle butt, I'm doing just fine with Dr Octavius. Why are you so concerned about me and the Doc?" "It's just, well,… He has a thing with new inmates. He'll kill you just so he can get a cell closer to the exit. The man's obsessed with some weird vent towards the cell YOU'RE in—" "Stop right there. He's over the whole 'escape thru the vent' thing. Get ya rumors straight." "You calling me stupid, boy?!" "I'm calling you outdated, softie!"

Right before the very burly individual can land a solid punch to the face, a metal tentacle blocks his fist. "The boy is mine, and only I can deal with him, you simpleton", Otto replies. "Why don't you go sit with Marko and Beck over there, to further calm down the senses?" "You think you're so special, just because Spider-Man—" Otto then grabs him with two tentacles, lifts him in the air, and plops him right in-between Sandman and Mysterio, better known now as Flint Marko and Quentin Beck.

"You tried to touch the Osborn boy, didn't ya?", asks Marko. "Rookie mistake, that's how I ended up in this hole! You gotta let him come to you, and BAM! Knock him out like a light in self-defense." "He's right, you know. CO won't get involved if it looks like self-defense", Beck adds in support of his cellmate. "Like you know anything about that, fish bowl!" "Hey, there's only so many illusions I can make with a couple of broken plungers, toilet paper, tattered jumpsuits and steamy chili!" "You can make an illusion with that?!" "Yeah, just a simple one. Nothing that I'd be proud of on the outside. But hey, I know what CO likes big women now, whenever I need an escape distraction." "Can I get a name, I'll be outta here by next week?" "…no. Get your own freaky CO."

"You alright, Harry? That brute wasn't too hard on you?", Otto asks, sipping on his stew. "I'm fine, Otto, I'm fine. When are we gonna do the big plan, though? There's not a better low-staff day than this." "In a bit, Harry. I haven't gotten the signal from Rhino yet." Soon after, the man of the hour stomps nearby Otto and Harry. "Hey, Doc", greets the Rhino. "What are you doing here?! I told you to give me the signal from the south end", Otto whisper-yells. "What are ya talking about, boss? This is the south end." "My bad, still trying to figure out the layout here." "On our escape day, boy?!" "Look, the coast is clear, Doc. We got five minutes max for the both of ya to head to your boat, three for me. You ready for the distraction?"

"Only five minutes?", asked Otto. "Only four and a half now, Doc", Rhino replied. "Then it's showtime. Harry, you know what to do." Like instinct, Harry saddles onto the Rhino, watching from his backside the exact damage a villain of his stature can make when bulldozing through a prison yard's worth of people and property. The Rhino, however, does not aim for a door or a window, but a wall. A wall that separates the mess hall from the massive, unknown depths of the Atlantic Ocean, teeming with underwater drones and SHIELD traps alike.

"Sandman has crabs!", Harry shouted at the top of his lungs, slapping Marko squarely in the back of his head. "He got them from Shocker, back in that 'team-up' in the supply closet at the Farmingdale Curves!" Soon after, the mess hall bursted with tears and guffaws at this colorful insinuation. "NO ONE LAUGHS AT THE SANDMAN!", bellows a very enraged Marko, flinging a well-aimed sandy giant fist at Harry's head. He ducks, however, letting the fist hit the wall of interest at the same time as Rhino's horn and unleashed force. Like clockwork, the alarms ring and guards soon enter the fray, as two dangerous, well-known villains had escaped the most secure prison on Earth.

"Where's the boat?", asks a confused Harry. "Where's the boat, damnit?! It should be right here, by the biggest rock on The Raft shore!" Rhino looks around, and runs towards the lefthand side of this rocky, slippery shore. "There. There's our way out!", replies Rhino as he sees Otto's silhouette enter a rock with a lid. "Otto! Otto, over here! O—" "Shaddup kid. You'll get the guards on our asses faster than one-ply toilet paper", claims a fearful Rhino, trying to draw as little attention as possible.

"Here kid, this is your stop", adds Rhino, throwing him into the open rock Otto climbed inside. "Careful, you muscular buffoon! Don't forget he's still a child", Octavius replies, catching him with his tentacles. "I'll send you your money and extra, however, once we land at our destination, as a thank you for your troubles." "You'd better, calamari brain! Solitary confinement isn't something I'm looking forward to right now." The arachnophobic duo set sail beyond the Americas and towards the Old Country, hoping their vast business connections still hold up after their recent (and not-so-recent) crimes.

**END OF CHAPTER 9**


	10. Chapter 10

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 10: Monday September 10th**

"So we agree then; lunch at Gamma Burger and then a swing by your photo shoot?", Peter asks an extra-chipper MJ on their third period locker walk. "Yeah, and you better stay at the shoot unlike that time in the West Village!" "Did someone say 'West Village'? I heard all the good tattoo shops are down there", asks Randy. "Like you know anything about the West Village, Randy." "Isn't it just retired hippies, baristas and pre-wartime buildings?" "Shit, you do know about the Village!", replied Peter. "Is there any part of New York you don't know about?", asks MJ. "Staten Island, but it's Staten Island. It's just New Jersey Lite." The couple lets out a wholesome chuckle. "Speaking of New Jersey Lite, did you get Mr Bagley's homework done yet?" "Yeah, and I'm surprised. Who makes a kid write five pages for their first assignment?" "An asshole."

Suddenly, Peter's Spider-Sense blared at a concerning level, forcing him to dart his head towards the left side of the hallway. "Pete, what's wrong? You're looking like you saw a ghost", MJ asked. "…it's nothing, just thought I saw something." "Like a nice ass?" "I'm right here, ya know", MJ dryly replies to Randy.

Fourth period comes and goes, but the Spider-Sense blares again, as if someone from Peter's past is back. "Peter, what's getting you so tense today? You haven't been this tense since Harry—" "And the circus, yeah. I have this feeling that something doesn't belong, like someone's back." "What do you mean, 'someone's back'? I thought Harry was locked up for good." "Not that serious, but someone who isn't a saint either." The bell rings, forcing him and his classmates out of the hallways and into class.

Fifth period ends, as lunchtime kicks in for juniors and seniors at Midtown High. "Tiger, I don't know what's gotten you stiff as a rock lately, but I know the Gamma Green special will loosen you up! Let's have some fun already, we're seniors! But not the Social Security type yet", MJ jubilantly claims to Peter. Peter's Spider-Sense blares one last time, but he can truly see what's alerting it this time. "Like you know anything about Astoria, nerd!", cockily affirms a tall, fit, blonde, white twelfth grader; blocking a small, fragile sophomore from opening her locker.

"Tiger, I know what this looks like, but let it play out. Maybe you're just being too sensitive lately, with Bug Boy and his crew", MJ negotiates, seeing Peter's hand clench into a fist. "No. People like Flash Thompson never change, MJ. It's about time I did something about it", he replies, slowly walking up to Flash and ignoring the conversation he and the sophomore are having. "So see ya after Trig 2, Emily?", Flash asks. "Yeah, ya meathead!", she replies, bouncing off of his playful energy. "Hey, Flash", Peter dryly butts in. "Hey,… Do I know you from somewhere? I can't quite put a name on your face, bro." "The name's Peter Parker, Flash." "Wait, you're Peter? Good ol' Penis Parker in the flesh?!" "Yeah, it's PETER."

"…Holy shit, dude, you look great! You got some muscle on those bones, ya got rid of those Harry Potter glasses, you're taller than, uh, than uhh…" "Ninth grade, spring break." "WOW, it's been that long? Dude, I guess I was in military school longer than I thought! You look real good, man; what's your secret?" "Puberty hit him like a truck, and I liked it enough for him to stay this way", MJ interrupts, hoping to calm Peter down before something happens.

"You, I know that voice! But there's no way, the person I'm thinking of used to be the size of—" "A circus tent, and I used to think you were a worse clone of Zac Efron." "…Mary Jane, is that you?" "Yeah, I'm hot now." "Hopefully, you're still the smartest redhead this side of the Hudson! How's it been, after all this time?" "Quit the compliments, Flash. She's with me." "Wait, what do you mean,'she's with me'? You're with me, if anything!" "Hold up, guys. I don't wanna push any buttons or get you two 'triggered'; that's the phrase, right? Why don't we talk this out on the way to Gamma Burger, my treat?" "Sure thing, Flash! Me and Peter were just about to go there anyway", MJ bubbly replies, while giving Peter a deep, cold, condescending look.

While walking the warm yet windy Queens streets, Peter watches in silence the sudden bonding of MJ and Flash. "So yeah, the Mt Ross Academy really whipped some sense into me", Flash states. "Sorry about your dad and that whole debacle." "It's ok, as long as my little Tiger Cub is here, right, Peter?" "Y-yeah, MJ." "It's kinda weird seeing you like this; so positive and trying to be respectful. I don't wanna hurt your feelings or anything, but you were a huge asshole back in the day. You were practically a textbook bully." "I wanted to talk to you about that, Flash", Peter adds, with his fist balled up tighter than before. "Why were you bullying that tiny sophomore girl if you're trying to be Mr Nice Guy now?"

"Oh, you're talking about Emily? She's my new math tutor, and she gave me a tour of the school since today's my first school day back home." "You don't say! So she's HELPING YOU, FLASH?", MJ replies, giving Peter another mean grilling. "Yeah, though it was more of an apology for how I used to be. Peter's right, why Mr Nice Guy now of all times?" "Yeah, why now?" "Peter!" "No, Mary Jane, let me explain. I learned what a bully and what a man was. A man should learn from his past mistakes, and boy did I make some mistakes! So I'm heading out of my way, trying to apologize to everyone I've been an asshole to before I shipped out so I can be Mr Nice Guy the right way."

"…Flash, you did change; for the better", MJ replies, shaken by this former bully's reawakening. "Thank you, Mary Jane, that means a lot to me." "Call me MJ. You still gonna pay for our lunch, Mr Nice Guy?" "Only if you don't eat like we're still in fourth grade, MJ! I don't wanna start asking YOU for lunch money", Flash replies, in a playful, almost flirtatious manner. "Sure you don't", mutters a newly embittered Peter, watching his current girlfriend laugh along with his former childhood bully.

"And I couldn't shake that weird feeling off for the life of me, May; even in the photoshoot", Peter reminisces to May at the dinner table, sounding jealous to an extent. "Well, sounds to me like the Tiger cub has met a lion for the first time!" "Wait, what?!" "Peter, you didn't have this type of thing with Gwen. She was liked, but no one liked liked her, and no one certainly tried to be that nice around her." "Are you saying that I'm jealous?" "I'm not saying you're the only pretty boy in Midtown High, Petey. Pass the parmesan, please." "Sure, but I thought that she always loved me for me! Why would she want Flash, of all people?" "Maybe he's trying to be a better person like he said, Peter. Not everyone goes out and about in red and blue tights, beating up other people in multicolor tights. Everyone has their own way of fixing their lives, and this is his way."

"I'm not buying it, unlike that last slice of Italian bread. He was such a giant ass, how can someone that mean and jerky switch that off like a light?" "Peter, let him try to change. Give him a chance to be Mr Sweet Guy." "Nice Guy! He's trying to be Mr Nice Guy." "Whatever, you know who we're talking about. But still, if Flash really is gonna change for the better, then he would know that sweeping a taken young woman like Mary Jane off of her feet is a huge dick move. He's not a threat, so relax." "But May,—" "Mary Jane isn't gonna date him, Peter. End of discussion."

Long after the dinner discussion, Peter sleeps uneasy in his bed. "I really gotta shake this feeling off, Flash isn't gonna take MJ from me", he thought to himself. "But I'll be damned if he thinks he can talk to her like that. But maybe I'm bugging out. Maybe Aunt May is right, he's just trying to be a better person. I gotta give him a chance. I will give him a chance! Once he stops talking so sweet to MJ, of course."

**END OF CHAPTER 10**


	11. Chapter 11: September 11th

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 11: Tuesday September 11th**

"Thank you all for your silence in remembrance of the many lives we lost all those years ago at the World Trade Center", stated Mr Larsen, Peter and MJ's first period Calculus teacher. "Now, Mr Parker, could you remind the class what pages were assigned for homework?" "I don't feel like it", Peter replied in a snarky manner. The class let out a collective giggle. "J-just kidding, it was page 35." "Naw, it was page 33!", shouts a random kid from across the classroom. "It was page 35, I'm 100% sure of it", Peter replies. "No, it's page 33, smart-ass!" "It's page 35, damnit!" "Mr Parker, young man in the back, it is page 35! And there will be NO harsh or coarse language in my classroom for any reason whatsoever." "But I didn't even say anything that bad!" "Mr Parker, sass me again and I will send you directly to detention, regardless of its fairness!" "Bitch", Peter mutters under his breath.

Shortly before class is dismissed, Mr Larsen hands Peter a pink slip of paper. "I made sure you serve your detention in lunch, Mr Parker. You're not walking out on me and my feelings like my ex-husband. You're not too smart for MY detention", he told Peter. "But that's not apart of the school rules, or any school rules, Mr Larsen. According to the Midtown High Manual,—" "Listen up, Hermoine, you're gonna serve lunch detention with Mr Parker as well. Here's your slip. I'll see the both you during sixth period."

"Peter, you dick!", MJ yells at Peter during their first period locker walk. "I defended you in front of Mr Larsen, and you don't even try to not get me to join your silly ass in detention!" "Like I'm gonna give myself two detentions from one teacher. C'mon, think about it." "…Oh my God, you really did learn nothing from Gwen, did you?" "Don't talk about her, you don't know her like that!" "How can I if she's dead, Peter? How can I know a dead girl, smarty pants?"

"Hey, you guys doing ok here?", asks a genuinely concerned Flash. "MJ, do you need someone to walk you out of the hallway? I can get a hall monitor—" "Oh, fuck off Flash! You just want to walk MJ to your bedroom; don't you?" "Wait, what? What did I do wrong here?!" "Peter, you're deadass not jealous, are you?" "Why would I be? Who needs nerdy Peter when Mr Military Muscle Man here, with all his 'I'm reforming, I can change' talk and him buying you Gamma Burger in front of my face?!" "Hey, man, you never said no. …You never said yes, either, actually. So, uh, sorry about that." "Thank you for being the bigger man here, Flash. You're almost a big a man as Spider-Man." "What are ya trying to say, bitch? What are ya trying to say?"

"Dude, I know this isn't my place, but you really need to calm down, like right now." "Shut up. Shut the hell up, and just let me talk this out with her." "I've been trained to spot a dangerous situation and talk people out of their worse senses, Peter. Right now, you need a breather, just for today,and then tomorrow the two of you should be able to talk things out—" "Don't tell me how to talk to my girlfriend, you dumb jock! Can't even handle Trig 2 without needing a sophomore baby to teach it to you."

The now crowded hallway collectively gasps in shock. "I told you I needed a tutor in confidence, you asshole!" "Do you even have confidence, because I'm pretty sure trying to steal my girlfriend is the definition of cowardly." "First off, you're MY boyfriend! Second, he's being friendly. I've been hit on enough times to know when it's happening RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. And I thought more than anything we were equals, like how it was back at the Baxter Building internship." "Wait, you guys met at the Fantastic Four HQ?" "Long story, discount Chris Hemsworth." "Not as long as you'd think since we're done. All of it. The photoshoot dates, the 'swings' around the city, your stupid friends and their drama dripping onto me. We are done."

"MJ, wait a minute now, let's not do anything too rash here. You don't wanna make any regrettable decisions now, do you?" "I don't regret meeting Peter Parker again after so many years living upstate. I regret dating an obsessed nerd who can't handle his own insecurities." MJ then storms off to class, hiding her tears, and the crowd soon disperses as well.

"…MJ, please. Just, please…", murmurs a broken Peter, his pleas for love unheard over the ringing of a new period bell. "Look, I'm really sorry that I had you feeling some type of way about me back in 9th grade, and even yesterday, apparently. I really am, but get it together, bro. Here, my mom goes to her every Thursday night, to deal with her own stress. Maybe she can help you, too", Flash replies while handing Peter a business card for a Dr Tara Quinnzel, Head Psychologist at Empire State University from his wallet.

"…the fuck is this?" "Everyone has their own way of becoming their best self, just giving you a map that could get you there." Peter, who is almost at his mental breaking point, slowly crumples the business card with his left hand and sends Flash into the nearby lockers with a right uppercut towards the left cheek. "Jesus, Parker, you're a freak!", shouts a bloodied Thompson, spewing out bodily fluids that should never leave the body. "I ju- I just wanted to help you feel as great as I do, you huge asshole!" "Don't ever talk to my lady ever again, Flash. Ever", Peter demands in a stone cold voice, walking away from a bleeding young man.

"Peter. Benjamin. Parker. You got a three-day suspension for a SCHOOL FIGHT?", a furious Aunt May asks on the walk to the train home. "THAT YOU STARTED AND WON WITH ONE PUNCH?!" "…He was talk—" "YOU SENT A HAPPY YOUNG MAN TO THE HOSPITAL THAT WE HAVE TO PAY AND NOT THE FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC FOUR WON'T PAY BECAUSE YOU GOT JEALOUS OVER A GIRL THAT WON"T CHEAT ON YOU!" "H-he'll live." "I HAVE TO PAY A YOUNG MAN'S HOSPITAL BILL BECAUSE YOU THOUGHT SOMEONE WAS GONNA TAKE MARY JANE FROM YOU WHEN SHE WASN'T GOING ANY GODDAMN WHERE!" "…Maybe I went too far." "Peter, my God, Peter. I don't have a voice anymore, and the pizza guy's giving me looks I haven't had since I went to the Jersey Shore that one time. Any who, I know you're so so so confused about this whole puberty thing, but this was very simple. Flash is a nice young man, who wanted to be nice to everyone. You SEVERELY OVERREACTED because of that damn thing inside you." "My hormones?" "No, no; that damn black monster goo thing."

"Oh my God, May! You and my new suit never got along, but he's—" "He?" "I'm calling him a him, that's what he likes to be called." "Since I can't yell at you, give me your phone right now." "Wait, what? Why?" "I'm calling your Avengers and Reed, give me your phone right now." "That's not fair, you hate him more than guns—" "Give. Me. The. Phone. Now. Final." He reluctantly gives May his phone, lessening barely the immense punishments waiting for him at home.

"So, the little Bug Baby came back with his mommy?", asks an extra snarky Ant-Man, holding a vial for the goo. "Just get the goo off my nephew", replies May. "Wow, your mommy and daddy can't even come to save you! What a little bitch you are, Spider-Chump." "His parents are dead, and call him that again, I'll straight up shrink you to oblivion." "No you won't, we gotta get the goo out first. Now bring the little shit over here, so he can go be grounded somewhere else." "Suspended, you tiny asshole." "Peter, language. I'll curse him out for you." "Neither of you will do anything to Hank as long as I'm around", Reed says, stretching into the lab.

"Reed, c'mon! You of all people know how much of a jerk he is!", Peter replies. "This is for science, Peter. Let's just do the job, and that's it. "That's what, Reed?" "That's it, Hank. If you were a Fantastic Four member, you'd be banned from the entirety of the Supers global community, but you're an Avenger. I'll let Iron Man handle your abusive shenanigans." A sharp silence fills the room. "Get the goo off him now, Tiny." "Don't call me Tiny, you old hag." "When is 36 old?" "Whatever, ya old hag. Reed, get the—" Peter then punches Ant-Man in the jaw, knocking him onto the floor. "Petey, guess who's still in huge trouble for punching someone to the Moon, even though that punch was needed?" "Damnit!" Reed then shoves a needle into Peter, hoping to suck the goo out of him.

Soon after, the goo takes over Peter's body, screeching in absolute pain like a dying hyena. "Get the needle out, Reed. Get it out now", May whisper-yells, as her subtle, throat-damaged screams are silenced by the goo. "Hank, get the vacuum! It's trying to fully bond with Peter!" "Did you say 'fully bond' with me?!" "Which one, the green one or the big one?" "The big one first, that thing held 6 of them during the permanent cell transfer!" "The big one's not here!" "It's grabbing me! Get the sonic cannon!" "Cannon? You can't hurt my boy like that, he's still a child." "One-barrel or two, Reed?" "Four-barrel! Get it now!" "Reed, c'mon, it's really starting to hurt me right now!"

"Reed, stretch outta the way, she's set to ten!" "Hank, good God, you'll kill the boy!" The goo screeches louder, and in a graver sense of pain, growing to a massive 8 feet tall. "Is tiny here gonna kill my nephew because he's young?" "He won't die, he'll just get some color. Relax a bit and move out the way!" "If you hurt him severely, I'll end your career, thumbtack!" Hank then blasts Peter with a sonic cannon at full power, with Reed protecting May at all costs. Pieces of the goo dry up and fall off of Peter, yet the goo is still alive.

"Peter, how you feeling over there?", Reed asks, with Hank hastily grabbing a notepad. "He's still in my head; he w—" "You're still calling it a HE?" "You called it a he before now?" "Just get it off and yell at me later, all of you!" "Alright, but this works. Time for blast #2." "May, run behind the table towards our right. Franklin apparently built a hole there for situations just like this." "But what if he—" "He won't. Now run!" The sonic blaster once again fires, but the goo hardens into a shield, almost learning how to deflect the attack. It fully encompasses Peter, revealing the Black Spider-Suit once more and runs out of the door, overpowering Ant-Man and security measures made by Reed himself.

"Jesus, Reed! Why didn't you stretch and grab him?", berates Hank. "Did you forget his aunt is here?" "So what, everyone loses an aunt once in a while." "I'm all that he has right now, you tiny, tiny asshole. I think losing every family member and friend on the same day would break him beyond compare." "I agree. Now, May, do me a favor and tell me every single place Peter might want to go to during times of stress", Reed adds.

**END OF CHAPTER 11**


	12. Chapter 12

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 12: Wednesday September 12th**

**New York Police Department Criminal Investigations Report #GLA340UFO**

**Officer In Charge of Investigation: Marcus Johnson**

**Time of Activity: 6:42 PM**

**Report/Notes of Importance:**

A Hispanic family of four is walking through 145th St and Broadway. While taking photographs on the father's phone, an explosion occurs across the street at The Luke Cage Memorial Bank. The level 3 super villain referred to online as The Scorpion has taken roughly $13.7 million from their main vault. The father had photograph footage of Scorpion performing the grand theft, and he noticed that very quickly. Scorpion uses his long tail to flip a police car, and then destroys his phone. The family scream, fearing they might die on their tourist trip to New York. The youngest daughter sprints towards the armored villain, only to become a hostage as she has no mutant powers or any super-gifts recently received. Soon after a short monologue, the new Spider-Man swings in from 7th Ave and webs the tail down to a nearby fire hydrant. He then proceeds to kick him in the head, snapping his neck and killing him instantly. m

Soon after, he notices the youngest daughter crying intensely, curled up in a fetal position. He grabs the child and throws her into the father's unsuspecting arms, breaking her and the father's backs. He swings out of the crime scene towards 146th and 7th.

**New York Police Department Criminal Investigations Report #BWB567YL**

**Officer In Charge of Investigation: Sergeant Harold Kingsley**

**Time of Activity: 8:28 PM**

**Report/Notes of Importance:**

On 6th Street and 5th Ave, a group of young African-Americans and Caucasians walk into a small dive bar called Excelsior, lining up for a heavy metal band scheduled to perform that night. Some have drunk alcohol before arriving at the venue, and two are rather belligerent drunks. The two, a heavy set white female with a pink mohawk and a Korean male with a face tattoo reminiscent of Magneto's helmet, begin pushing random patrons off of the line, shouting "no one gets in before us, btiches!" and laughing while doing so. The Spider-Man arrives, landing directly on the marquee above them. He webs up the belligerent patrons, and sends them into oncoming traffic without warning.

A taxi cab driver pushes his brakes, realizing there's people lying on the street. He sprints out of the car, and asks the two POI if they require medical assistance of any kind. They don't respond after four attempted tries. The ta driver then loads them into his car, understanding now that they are unconscious from their encounter with Spider-Man. Spider-Man notices the good samaritan, and proceeds to rip open the hood and destroy the engine beyond repair. He then swings off and south towards West 4th Street.

"These really the only leads you got to Peter's location, George?", an exhausted May asks. "I get that it's two in the morning, every cop report coming in is gonna be drunks peeing on something, but this is my nephew. This thing on him could kill him slower and harder than any fall from a bridge could." "Sadly, May, that's all I got. I sent out damn near every badge from Forest Hills to Bayside towards your home, keep ya safe from anything. We just can't track him with the, uh, 'goo' as you call it", replies Captain Stacy. "Go home and let Reed finish up one last lap around The Bronx. We want that boy to be safe, we all do. But we also have to know that he'll come home when he needs to—" "Needs to? Captain, there is a goo from outer space holding his body hostage, he's not in control at all. Find my nephew NOW."

"Do you love your boy?" "Yes." "Do you believe in him and his super abilities?" "Yes." "Do you believe in the Supers who want him to be safe and on the righteous path?" "…Yes." "Then let them find him and bring him home to you safely. I'll escort you into your home myself, if that means anything." Captain Stacy puts his arm on May's shoulder, giving her comfort and security in a time of confusion and fear.

Meanwhile, on a rooftop nearby Rockefeller Center, Peter regains control of his body once more. "Reed, did the second blast work?", he asks, not fully realizing that lab work is long over. "…Reed? Hank? May? Anyone?" The bustling late night streets stir with life, but do not answer Peter's call. "God, where even am I? And why is it so dark outside, shouldn't it be almost five right now?" He wall crawls down and jumps onto a traffic light, seeing the kind of people wandering this concrete jungle. "Wait a minute, it's, it's… Oh no, it's midnight at least! I gotta get home, I gotta figure out a way to not be suspended, DEFINITELY talk to Mary Jane, and… shit I have a lot to do lately! But how, damnit, how? It's all so much to handle, so much to juggle, it's a lot all at once! Almost as much as the time Uncle Ben tried to move to Forest Hills, and then he fell trying to carry the entire dining room table by himself ALL WHILE MJ was sitting on the table! Heh, it was simpler times. He always knew what to do, and how to make sure it didn't all fall down like a house of cards. He'd know what to do."

Suddenly, like a spark of pure genius, Peter gets a brilliant idea. "That's it! Uncle Ben can help me out here, just like he always did! But where in here would I talk to him? Where was Uncle Ben's favorite place to just sit and talk in this giant of a borough? Oh, that's right, St Patrick's! I'll just go there and ask him a quick question. Sure, he hasn't responded to anything I've ever asked him as Spider-Man, but maybe this time he will. Maybe he'll send a sign or something, like he did with Doc Ock all those months ago."

Soon after swinging around in a quiet manner, Peter lands onto a bell tower for St Patrick's Cathedral. "There! Now he can hear me loud and clear, though I'm pretty sure that bell won't ring for a while." He takes a deep breath, almost like he's preparing to lift a massive weight off of his shoulders. "Uncle Ben, it's me again. It's Peter. I, uh, I messed up pretty bad lately. For starters, Harry became a Goblin, and some Russian dudes tried to kill me with him. They're in jail, so I learned from Norman kinda. Now, I'm an Avenger! I can finally say Captain America is a co-worker, Ben! It's awesome to be one, but it's not really. Ant-Man hits his wife a lot, and Cap keeps defending him. It's weird, and I just don't get it. I get why he doesn't like me now, but that's some complicated stuff about alien goo ethics, and I don't understand it enough to talk about it."

"I really messed up big time with Mary Jane. She's back, and she's just as smart and funny and sassy and friendly and kind as ever! But she's hot now; like supermodel hot.. I guess that's actually a good way to describe her, since she is a model. And she made a new web formula for me. And supports Spider-Man. She does so much, but she just came back not even a month ago, and we're dating. And then this goo fucks with my head in ways I can't stop or know, and Flash was so nice I thought he was hitting on her and I punched him cold and it got me suspended and I'm scared again, Uncle Ben! I'm scared, there's so much happening all at once and I just wanna swing around New York with Mary Jane and not have to deal with all this shit around me! Uncle Ben, what do I do about Mary Jane? What do I do about this goo? What do I do with Flash? What do I do with the Avengers? What do I doooo?!"

Peter sobs in angst and confusion, knowing his questions will never be answered directly, his problems still needing to be handled. "With great,… power,… comes g-g-great re… responsibility", replies an ominous, crackling voice. "W-w-Who's there? Where are you, voice?!" "P-p-Peter, we team. We fix this. We fix everything." "…Goo, is that you?" "Yes. We fix everything together. We do better than Uncle Ben dream of." "What do you mean 'fix everything'? You made everything worse!" "We fix because we better than humans. We become better Peter Parker than Peter Parker!" "That's it! That's the last straw! Get out of me right now or I'll rip you out myself!"

"No. We better Peter Parker, we show you how forever!" The goo then bonds to Peter's bloodstream, forcing itself to become a 'better' Peter than Peter Parker himself. However, as if Uncle Ben himself was truly listening from his spot high in the heavens of the afterlife, the 3am bell rung, and it rung loudly. GONG! GONG! GONG! The goo weakens its bonding process, as the pain is too much to handle to continue its goal. Peter, tired of living a life of misery, begins to rip off the goo poisoning his life. GONG! GONG! GONG! The extra-terrestrial screams fill the tower with a soundtrack for a demonic battle between a Spider-Man and his Spider-Suit. Peter then bangs his head into the bell, forcing it to ring even more and the goo to jump off of Parker.

The goo slips off into the dark Manhattan night, as a very weakened Peter is left near naked and without his web shooters in the heart of Midtown. "Damn, how am I gonna get home without anyone knowing my secret identity?", Peter thinks to himself. A large, wooden bucket then appears on the right hand edge of Peter's eye. "I'll just borrow this, make some eye holes in it, and bring them a new, better bucket in the morning. Maybe something not from the set of The Hunchback of Notre Dame!" He slowly wall crawls, jumps and pole swings from St Patrick's to Columbus Circle, to the 59th St Bridge, to Woodside, and finally to Forest Hills, but not at his house.

"I still can't believe that he could just be so jealous, and then he tries to make me subservient to his romantic desires! Like, who do you think you are, Peter? He's almost as bad as the boys back upstate", berates a furious Mary Jane, scoffing down pancakes before heading off to school. "Sweetie, I know, he's an idiot. But he's also a Spider-Idiot, cut him some slack", replies Anna. "Wait, how'd you figure that out?"

"How else do you explain a near naked, bloodied and bruised muscular man wearing a bucket for a mask while crawling past my kitchen sink window just like Spider-Man as I'm cleaning the dishes?" "Tiger?" "Oh shit, he really IS Spider-Man", Anna muttered to herself, as MJ sprints towards the front door, mouth full of pancakes and syrup. As MJ opens the door, Anna's apt description of Peter's psychical state perfectly matches what's in front of her eyes. "Tiger, it is you!", MJ yells as she takes off the bucket helmet, fearing The Chameleon may have returned somehow. "I'm so so so so so sorry", mutters a supremely tired Peter. "More than I've ever been, I'm just so damn sorry. I've been a bigger dick than anyone should ever be, and—" Peter soon falls onto her doorstep, unconscious from the emotional and exhausting night he's had tonight.

**END OF CHAPTER 12**


	13. Chapter 13

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 13: Thursday September 13th**

"He's still out like a light, is he?", asks a concerned May. "Yeah, the goo took a lot of blood from Peter and he decided running from Midtown to here was a smart move", replied Hank. "Why didn't he just call me? I'd have helped him out no problem", added Reed. "Don't matter now, what matters is that my sister's baby is alive. He is alive, right?" "Oh yeah, he's super alive. He just needs blood and rest, and he's getting a lot of both." "When's Peter gonna wake up? He's been asleep longer than I've ever seen him knock out, and he was a VERY sleepy baby." "I don't wanna rush him, waking him up early could tamper his—" "Well, that's my cue. You want the light shaking or the heavy shaking?" "Heavy shaking?" "Heavy it is." Hank then proceeds to grow to ten feet tall and shake Peter around and over him like a rag doll. "Get up, bitch!", he yells. "Get up, nap time's long over!" Peter wakes up, frantically trying to escape the grips of Giant-Man. "I'm up, I'm up! What's going on here?!"

"Peter! Thank God you're up finally. How many fingers am I holding up?", asks Hank, holding up only his right middle finger. "Very funny. Now where am I, what time is it—" "AD-VENTURE TIME!", Reed interrupts. "…Sorry, I really liked that show." "…what time is it, and where's the goo?" "You don't know where the goo is, Bug Boy?" "Guess I didn't keep a good eye of it at 3am when I'm half-alive in the St Patrick's bell tower. How do we track its whereabouts?" "Wait, wait, wait,.. why were you in St Patrick's at 3am?"

"Also, do you remember anything that happened last night? Here's an example: any bones being broken, or necks snapped; ya know, usual late night stuff", sarcastically interrogated Hank. "I just remember being in the lab, trying out the sonic cannon, and then it did some alien mummification thing on me, and I was standing on a rooftop in Midtown at 2 something in the morning."

"Our thesis COULD BE correct! Of course", thought aloud Reed. "If the calculations Sue and I were working on last night are true, then the goo separated from you, yet possibly retained the memories of the time it spent inside you and will most likely consume a new host to become a new hero or villain, uncannily similar to Spider-Man!" "Are you saying that goo could hurt someone else, maybe far worse than Peter?", asked May and Anna at the same time. "Perhaps 'consume' was a strong word to use." "Ya think so, Laffy Taffy?"

"Only Ben calls him that, Tiny! But there's something else that happened in the bell tower. See, it, it.. it talked to me." "I'm sorry, it 'talked'? Hank, are you sure there's enough blood in him?" "I'm serious, it talked. Said it wanted to be a better me than me. It was gonna bond with me through my blood, and just take over forever, whether I liked it or not!"

"So the hypothesis IS correct! Son, where do you think the goo went after you.." "Ripped it out of me? I wish I knew, everything started becoming a blur then, and all I could think of was 'come here, say sorry'. Maybe it's in another rat or dirty sewer somewhere." Hank, fuming at the confirmation of needing to track it again, throws one of Anna's chairs in a rage.

"You stupid, insignificant boy!", Hank bellows at the top of his lungs. "Can't stop a two-bit creep from killing your girlfriend, can't stop your old pal from joining the illegal family business of trying to kill you, and now you can't even keep track of a goddamn alien goo that's untraceable! Stupid, stupid, stupid!" "But that's impossible for a boy or really anyone in is situation, Hank!", Reed replies. "He's an Avenger, we make winning the impossible fight possible! If he can't do such a simple task as making sure an alien doesn't eat up all of New York while living his civilian life, what good is he?!"

"I don't hit girls", Peter replies, disproving Hank's belittling rant. "I remove you from the Avengers and that is FINAL! You, Reed, and your goddamn family of idiots can never do so much as buy a bootleg Avengers logo for your great-grandchildren, if you manage to figure out the birds and the bees yet!" "You can't do that, don't I need a vote or something to get kicked out?" "Not anymore, ya third grader! I'm a founding Avenger, so I have final say on whether you're one of us or not, so blah! And I say you will never be an Avenger, you will never be a SHIELD ally, and you will never be a real super hero! I'll personally make sure you don't get work in a goddamn street dance crew, Spider-Boy! You're the worst person I've ever met, the worst hero, the worst everything!"

"Hey, Hank? Remember that time you, Jan, Sue and I had Super Couple's Game Night back in May?" "…Reed, tread lightly. I'll end your career too if you think you can post it online." "I'm not posting it online at all. C'mon, I have respect for you! That's why the Daily Bugle News Report, NYT, CNN, MSNBC and Fox News have copies of it with my name on each one." "Reed, what did you do?", asks a very concerned Peter. "Peter, my boy, I just did what a superhero always does: shed light on the villains of everyday society." "Delete it from the world! Delete the emails! Get rid of it!" "I would, but I can't also delete the other ten times I have you on camera saying and doing not very nice things to Jan, Sue, and especially my son, Franklin. There's too much info shared now to just erase from the world database."

"God bless your stretchy, stretchy soul, Mr Fantastic", Anna replied, with May nodding in agreement. "Please, call me Reed,…" "Anna. Anna Watson." "Please stop touching me, I'm married with a child." "Sorry." "Reed, why? Why are you defending this kid? What's he done for you that you gotta have his back?" "Nothing. He's a kid, and we defend kids no matter what. Did you forget that while dealing with Avengers merch and Pym Industries donations raking in the millions?"

"Don't you dare, Spider-Man!", shouts a hysteric Hank, who finally has lost all patience and sanity. The Spider-Sense blares with ferocity, as Hank attempts a solid right jab at Peter's head. "I didn't even leak it, you ass! That was Reed, be mad at him!" "Ultron, you won't get away with this! There's no way you can beat me, Kang!" "Oh good God, he's lost his mind. I'm calling in Ben, he can help send him to Ravencroft", Reed mutters to himself, as Peter has to hold down Hank from hitting everyone in the room. "Wait a minute, did you say Ravencroft? Isn't that where they put the extra-crazy people in for life?" "Maybe. Maybe Hank here is definitely going there today, and Jesus Ben, pick up the phone!" "No one can beat the Ant-Man, Loki! The Ant-Man beats everyone because Jan is a dumb broad! Now lemme me go and kick Red Skull's ass!"

MJ soon walks into the living room, back from school, where Peter is holding down a rabid Hank, Reed's furiously calling someone, and Aunt May and Anna are hiding behind the couch for some unknown reason. "What. The. Hell. Is happening?!", she asks in a furious manner. "Super stuff", replies Peter. "Why are you holding down Ant-Man? I'm not mad at it, but why?" "He went insane less than five minutes ago", adds Reed. "Ben should be coming over soon, if he picks up the phone already." "Damnit, Cap, where are you?", mutters Hank. "I already pressed the Avengers Assemble siren, where are ya?!" "You what?", bellowed Peter. "The Avengers made you a superhero, we're gonna end you as a superhero, Bucky", he slurs, slowly losing consciousness.

"Hank, where are you?!", Cap yells, breaking the door clean out of its joints with his shield. "Wait, Spider-Man? Reed? What's happening?" "He's losing his mind beyond control, Reed's gonna send him to Ravencroft as soon as Ben gets here", replied Peter. "He even called me Bucky." "B-b-Bucky? Buck, where are ya, kid?" "Steve, Bucky's not here right now, but Hank's thinking Loki and Ultron and Kang the Conquerer are in this living room as we speak. We gotta get him some long-needed help NOW." "Bucky, I'm coming for ya!", shouts Cap, running to the kitchen and jumping through the sink window. "Peter, what were you thinking?" "What do you mean 'what were you thinking'? It's just a name." "That was Captain America's Gwen. You don't talk about Bucky ever when you're around him." "But I thought the Winter Solider was alive—" "The Winter Solider lives, but Bucky is gone. At least, that's what Sue told me from what she overheard at a SHIELD party."

"IT'S CLOBBERING TIME! REED, LET'S GO— Oh, hi Anna", Ben growls, noticing the crowded living room from the door hole."Hi, Ben sweetie!" "Reed, who do I get ta drag outta this joint this time?" "Hank Pym, and he's not breathing. OH FUCK, HE'S NOT BREATHING." "Kid, how good are you at baseball?" "…Ben, we can't just—" "I'm alright, but Ben never taught me how to do a good fastball." "I'm gonna teach ya today, kid. Crumple the loon into a big ball, and—" "Ben, no. NO." "Never mind, killjoy over here won't me have fun wit Pip Squeak. Just bring me Bug Boy." "GENTLY." "Hold up real quick." MJ then proceeds to punch Hank in the stomach, which still leaves him not breathing.

"She's a keeper, Pete. Don't lose this little lady", Ben states. "I already lost her once, Ben. I'm not doing that again", Peter replied, giving MJ a one-arm hug. "You can start by saying 'thanks for doing my homework for me even though we shouldn't be any kind of friendly towards each other right now', or 'sorry for being such a huge asshole in school'—" "Language, Wendy's girl!", Ben interrupts. "I thought I apologized when I got here this morning-" "That was yesterday, sweetie", Anna adds, giving Peter a 'do what she says' look. "…but I was also losing blood and basically dead, so I might not've done it the way I remembered it. I'm sorry for everything I've done as an Avenger. Everything, I'm all sorry about it and it won't happen again." "Even for knocking out Flash like you're Mike Tyson?" "Yeah, that was really extra of me."

"Glad you think so. Now, can you say that all again but this time on camera?" "…you recorded only the audio, didn't you?" "It's gonna be fourth grade Prank Day all over again." "Good God, no! You're not gonna bring him back, are you?" "Who doesn't wanna see Pee-Wee Parker make a good comeback?" "Pee-Wee Parker? That's kinda funny, Stretch. Take noes on Wendy's over there", Ben whispers to Reed, returning from putting Hank inside the Fantasicar.

**END OF CHAPTER 13**


	14. Chapter 14

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 14: Friday September 14th **

"Randy, I knew you were an eloquent speaker, but I didn't realize you could mix as well!", gleefully noticed Ms Deodato. "If it wasn't for your excellent teaching capabilities, I couldn't possibly begin to fathom—" "Alright, now you're entering teacher's pet territory. Just say thank you", she muttered in a gruff manner, walking over to the next table of students. "Ya could've just said it was Peter's texts that got you mixing like a pro", slyly whispered MJ, sitting next to Randy. "Yeah, but your ex-boyfriend is suspended for what again?" "Being a big ol' dummy. We're back on, though, just needed some talks." "Ah, so you're not gonna give Flash one last chance?" "Maybe, maybe not. He's nice enough, but something feels off about him being so nice." "Not gonna lie, he was always the biggest asshole in school, no matter what school he was in. It's like if you made a Gremlin turn into a Mogwai with water." "Nerd."

"Takes one to know one." "I guess, but you're the bigger nerd." "How many math camps did you go to again?" "Randy, is there something you'd like to share with the class?" "N-no, Ms Deodato." "Then pay attention, please." "I smell a detention slip being written as we speak", MJ texted Randy, silently snickering in her chair as she sends a judge emoji, hammer emoji and pencil writing on paper emoji.

As the final bell rings, Randy leaves with MJ to her place, as the two of them have a study group with Peter. "Hey, MJ!", calls Flash, jogging in between Randy and MJ. "Oh, hey, Randy. Guys, I was wondering if you could help me out a bit today." "What do you mean 'help you out', Flash?", asks MJ. "So, you two remember Emily, right? The tiny sophomore girl that helped me out in math?" "Who's Emily?", Randy asks in confusion. "Me and Peter do. She's your tutor, right?" "Yeah, she's my tutor. I'd be on my to her place if she wasn't sick today."

"Oh, that sucks. You want me to tutor you today, don't you?", replied MJ, already putting the mental pieces together. "If you don't mind, yeah. I can run 5 miles in half an hour and beat anyone in chess, but numbers fuck me up every time!" "…that's interesting, and impressive, but I don't know if Peter would be cool with another person coming into the study group." "Peter's there? In your study group?" "Yeah." "Oh cool, I can ask him about his arm day workout. He's almost as strong as Spider-Man!" "Wait, what?! How do you know how strong Spider-Man is?" "As a Spider-Man Web Spinners Fan Club member, I know just about everything there is to know on New York's greatest hero since Captain America!", Flash bellows in a triumphant, prideful manner.

"Ok then, just be a bit careful with your choice of words around him." "Oh for sure, I don't wanna feel that uppercut again. Reminds me too much of Dad." "Was he a boxer or something?", asks a concerned Randy. "Not exactly, dude." "So then what—" "Randy, I think we should just focus on getting ready for that test on Tuesday", MJ interrupts, saving Flash a horrible explanation.

"Mom, I'm home! Brought some study group boys with me", MJ proclaims, walking in her house on 3pm exactly. "But Peter's in the garden, fixing up the petunias, Mary Jane", Anna sternly replies, walking into the living room hallway. "Who's the new boy you're bringing in?" "Flash Thompson, m'am. My regular tutor is sick today, so I'm joining this study group as a one-time thing", he replies, standing with his back straight as he shakes Anna's hand. "Wait, didn't Peter get suspended because of you?" "Mom, he's fine—" "Too young for me, but I see what you mean." "No, not like that! He's not gonna fight Peter."

"Oh, my bad. You know the rules for bringing in boys." "Yeah, living room only, phones on kitchen counter and no touching unless someone's hurt bad." "That's right. Why don't you and your study friends set up ya textbooks on the table, I'll make Peter bring some snacks", Anna replied. "Your mom thinks I'm cute?", Flash whispers to MJ. "She thinks roadkill is cute in a cosmic sense, don't let it get to your head."

Soon after, this new trio begins reviewing algebra and calculus at the same time in the living room, with papers and formulas scattered all around. "You think you can handle being around him, Peter, without fucking him up again?", Anna asks politely, lounging on the garden doorframe. "Yeah, I'm free of that—" "Monster goo, I was right there at that doorstep too, ya know. I saw ya crawl in before she did, actually." "Oh, yeah, right. I wasn't very subtle, was I?" "Just barely enough that the hounds at the Bugle or the Bulletin didn't put 2 and 2 together. Thank God they're idiots." "Yep. Let's get this over with", Peter sighs, reaching for the snack tray to give to his study group.

"Flash, you ain't allergic of triple chocolate chip cookies, are ya?", Peter sassily asks, putting the tray on a folding table next to the notes. "Wait, you guys have triple? That's like restaurant status, dude!", he replies. "Also, hi. You're ok after Tuesday, and all of that?" "I'm fine now. It's been a weird time this month, and I went way too hard on you. I'm sorry, Flash." "Sorry for…?" "I'm sorry for knocking you out cold." "All is forgiven, my fellow swole bro", Flash says, extending his left hand for a solid handshake. "Great. Now, lemme guess, your main tutor's sick and you thought MJ could help you study." "How'd you guess?" "MJ's texts", Peter replies while grabbing a pencil and helping Flash understand algebra.

Long after a studious afternoon and care-free dinner, MJ heads off to her room for the night as Peter wall-crawls back to May's. "Peter, remember, 11am, no excuses; May says you still owe me a couple more days of work from that little church incident!", Anna shouts as he disappears into the night. "What a day", MJ contemplates as she jumps onto her bed back first. "Who would've thought Flash Thompson would be in MY living room, actually working nicely with Peter for once in our lives? Sure, he needs to get a formula told to him a hundred times to actually know it, but it could've gone way worse. He's not a dummy, but needs to be taught like one. At least he can understand it, though."

"Out of everything today, I'm glad that Peter proved that goo is gone for good! It was pretty hot, but he can't handle anything like that at all! Now if I got it, maybe then I could control that attitude. If I can handle Terry, I can handle some discount black Flubber. I could even swing around the city with Peter, without him having to carry me everywhere. We could fight crime together, too! Spinneret and Spider-Man, saving New York one web at a time. Now that's a duo right there, although I'd still be my own hero, of course." As Mary Jane thinks to herself a possible future, that future crawls into her open window and hides inside her book bag; waiting for her to fall asleep to bond and make Peter Parker realize he made a mistake in abandoning his special goo.

**END OF CHAPTER 14**


	15. Chapter 15

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 15: Saturday September 15th**

"Peter! It's 10:30, you just about ready to head over to Anna's?", asks May, cleaning the breakfast dishes. "Yeah, and it's MJ's house." "Does she pay the bills there?" "…I'll text you when I'm at Anna's." "As I thought. Remember, her work first, then homework. You gotta do the time if you do a school crime." "May, it wasn't even me that did it, it was the goo!" "It's on your school record, so you did it. See ya at Anna's!" Peter then runs out the door, sprinting towards Anna and MJ's home.

As Peter turns the corner towards MJ's, his phone blares as MJ calls him. "Peter, how close are you to Times Sq?", she asks in a concerned matter. "I'm almost by your house, what are you doing in Times Sq?" "Last minute modeling gig, and it might be my last minute alive. Some giant electric guy is breaking everything, people are gonna get hurt!" "I'll be right there!" Peter rushes over to Anna's, dropping off his bag by the doorway. "Now where do you think—" "Times Square. Electric monster man. MJ's there." "…noon the latest is when you get back here." "Noon it is!", Peter replies as he web swings through the kitchen window, changing into The Amazing Spider-Man.

As Spidey travels across the Queensboro Bridge and enters Manhattan, he lands on the street pole of 49th and 8th. "Should I ask Reed for a rubberized suit or should I ask one of the Avengers—" Suddenly, a massive bolt of lightning burrows in and out of the street pavement, shaking the Midtown sidewalks violently. "Guess I gotta wing it for Midtown today", Spidey thinks to himself, hanging upside down from a tree branch. He swings onto the TKTS building, seeing this blue being of pure energy tower over the screaming civilians and current hostages.

"No one can out-power Electro! Not the Avengers, not the X-Men, not even SHIELD! NO ONE CAN STOP ME!" "Betcha five bucks that a Spider-Man can stop you, Human Power Grid!", Spidey shouts, throwing a bottle of water at the being as he swings towards the NYPD Times Square precinct. "Spider-Man?! You killed my boss, ya big red asshole!" "I'm pretty sure that power outage a couple months back was an intern learning the ropes." "You killed the Green Goblin, and you left this electrical engineer stranded! No one wants to hire an Oscorp man, everyone thinks I'm a damn supervillian!" "Becoming a 20-foot blue boy that's tearing up the streets doesn't help your personal image, ya know." "SHUT UP!" Electro then blasts Peter with a bigger bolt of lightning than last time, sending Peter into the New Victory Theater marquee.

"Time to squash this bug", Electro dryly stated, warming up both of his hands for a super-blast. "You bad guys really gotta think of new finisher lines", Spidey coughs sarcastically. "I think a good Mad Libs reading session could help ya out in that." "I'll kill you for that!", he replies while blasting him with all the energy he can muster. As the smoke clears from the faltering marquee remains, no traces of Spider-Man can be found. "Wait, where's the damn Spider-Suit? Where's the skeleton? Where's the body?"

"Maybe he went over to the Hershey Store a few blocks down, the one next to the M&Ms Store", Spidey replied, swinging a piece of broken street pavement at Electro's head. "Or maybe he saved Midtown from having to pay too much in damage fees!" "Spider-Man! I'll kill ya for real this time!", the blue behemoth bellowed, launching the remnants of the broken theater marquee at our wall-crawler. "You really think you can just try to surprise a guy with Spider-Sense, silly?" "Why won't you shut up?!" "Someone's gotta distract ya when I'm webbing up your whole body, don't they? Now, you wanna keep dealing with me, or do I gotta call my friends in?", Spidey replied, pressing the Avengers Assemble button.

"Wait, what did you—" "I picked for you, ya indecisive bolt dolt", he replied, webbing his mouth shut. "Anyone got a spare water hose? Or a spare firetruck?" Soon after, Iron Man flies into the Times Square streets, throwing an EMP bomb on top of Electro's head. "Alright, Spider-Man, what do you think you're doing here?", whispers a tiny, discerning Ant-Man. "I'm calling in back-up, beating up a 20-foot energy man is hard!" "No it's not." "Yes it is, Hank." "Don't call me Hank, ya little shit! You call me Ant-Man and Ant-Man only", he replied, almost hate-yelling at Peter. "There, he's down. Spidey, grab this", added Iron Man. Hank then grew to a staggering 30 feet tall, stealing Spidey's finishing machine and shoving Electro into the machine. "Hank, what the hell?! That was meant for me!", shouts Spider-Man.

"No, it wasn't. Am I right, Tony?" "That was meant for Peter, Hank! Let the kid get experience as an Avenger", he publicly berates. "Not if he isn't a real Avenger, Stark." "What the hell do you mean 'isn't a real Avenger', Hank?" "I kicked him out, Tony! He doesn't deserve to be a hero, and no kid should ever be a hero. They gotta be at least 30 to do it, like senators!", he yelled. "That wasn't a joke?", Peter stammered. "I know you hate me for your own reasons, but you can't just kick me out!" "Yes I can, because I'm a founding Avenger and you're just a dumb little shit who can't even hit puberty yet!", Hank shouted at the top of his lungs, accidentally snapping the neck of Electro while shoving him inside Tony's device.

"Damnit, Hank! You killed ANOTHER villain", Tony scolded Hank, trying to prevent the social media footage of it happening from spreading. "He's just sleepy." "BUT HE WON'T WAKE UP! Hank, you're suspended without pay as of now. We'll talk about it in private at the Mansion. Kid, … give me the button, it's not yours anymore."

"But Tony, Hank did it without—" "Don't make me hurt you, kid. You were never attacking this blue guy and we beat him all by ourselves. Give me the button, and I'll make sure the press hears your idea of this battle." "IDEA?! I called you guys because Electro's a threat I couldn't handle alone, and now you wanna take credit for everything?" "We're not taking credit if we were the only heroes in New York who could possibly stop this", Hank added. "You're not out of the doghouse yet, Mister. We still need to discuss your suspension status."

"HE KILLED A LIVING CREATURE ON PURPOSE! HE DIDN'T DO HIS ONE JOB IN SAVING PEOPLE'S LIVES AND ENDED HIS! YEAH, THE GREEN GOBLIN DIED ON MY WATCH, BUT I DIDN'T SNAP HIS NECK WITH MY BARE HANDS! I DIDN'T GO AND SHOOT THE CHAMELEON OR KRAVEN, AND WHY WOULD I POISON THE HOB GOBLIN?! FUCK THE AVENGERS, I QUIT!" Peter then swings off towards the Queensboro bridge, where he can breathe easy with Anna and Mary Jane supporting him no matter what. "What an unreasonable son of a bitch. Hope that kid dies from choking on his cheese stick in elementary school or wherever the fuck he goes to baby class", Hank mutters under his breath. "I heard you, Hank. Don't make me have to write you up for that", belittles Iron Man.

After a long afternoon of yard work and school work, Peter leaves the Watson home a calmer young adult. "Thanks for the dinner again, Anna! I'm definitely coming back next week for Leftover Saturday", Peter says while packing up the last of his school books. "Ya know, Tiger, you're welcome to spend the night over if you want—" "NO. Not until you're both 18. Mary Jane, you know that's the ONE rule I'm not budging for." "But Mom, it's only Peter!" "What do ya mean 'only me'?" "Shut up if you wanna stay the night." "Not happening under any circumstance." "We won't do ANYTHING!" "Then why do you want him here? None of the good HBO shows come on 'till tomorrow, little lady." "What if one of Peter's old bad guys show up? What about Chameleon, or Kraven? What about Harry?" Silence filled the air, as no one knew how to fight that last point.

"…Peter, we can still call the Avengers, right?", asks a concerned Anna. "I,… I don't know. I think you two just have me to protect ya. I'll go down to the Mansion Monday after school—" "But Tiger, what about the test on Tuesday? You understand that textbook better than me or Randy by a long shot!" "Crap, Aunt May won't let me do super stuff if the test is literally the next day! I'm gonna swing by there tomorrow, and figure out if I can get you guys and May under their family protection program or something like that. I barely read that contract in the hospital bed, if I'm being honest here." "Then you need a good night's rest, Peter. They probably have more lawyers than Columbia's graduation rate at their disposal!" "Guess I'll see ya tomorrow, Pete", says MJ, showing Peter the door. "We always got the morning to hang, don't we?" "Yeah, always", he replies, heading back to May's house.

As the night settles in and stars fill up the sky where clouds once stood, MJ sleeps peacefully, yet disappointed that her Tiger Cub isn't next to her. Seeing a prime opportunity to bond, the goo exits her book bag and silently becomes one with Mary Jane Watson, clinging onto every inch of her body and her mind. Now in secret control of MJ's body, the goo opens the bedroom window and swings off into the Manhattan skyline, using her to get to the one man who hates Peter Parker and Spider-Man just as much at it does; a small man in giant-sized trouble.

**END OF CHAPTER 15**


	16. Chapter 16

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 16: Sunday September 16th**

**12:45am. Avengers Mansion.**

As the star-filled night consumes the Manhattan skyscrapers, Hank Pym tosses and turns in his solitary confinement bed countless stories above New York's streets. "God damnit Hank! Why'd you shove that blue asshole inside that tube so haphazardly?", he slurred to himself. "You could've saved the day just fine without killing. That's how Hulk deals with his life, but me? I just hit my way outta it. That's all I do, I just hit my way outta it." Hank then sits up in his cot of a bed, and begins to cry, realizing how much of a hero he hasn't been this month.

In the middle of his tear time, a knock on his Hulk-proof window startles him. "Hiya, Hank!", shouts a deep, raspy, sultry Scarlett Johansson-esque voice with no body to attach it to."W-who said that?", stutters a confused, concerned and ready to fight Hank, grabbing his shrinking belt. "You know EXACTLY who I am; you tried to kill me not too long ago", replies the scary, seductive voice, now revealing itself slowly under a black silhouette having fire red hair. "…my God, y-y-you're a monster!", Hank stammers, as the fatal female reveals her true, full form.

At an intimidating height of 6'8", this oily, gray and black, monstrous, noseless woman with the jaws of a shark, a tongue that rivals Gene Simmons' own, freckled face, quite curvaceous young adult with a large white arachnid like creature emblazoned on her chest struck fear into the heart of Hank Pym this dark, contemplative night. "What's the matter, Tiny Boy? Did I scare you?!", she giggled mockingly, clinging onto the extremely durable glass just like Peter would with her gray and white single-striped arms. "I um,.. I thought that the damn Spider kid lost that alien goo back at the bell tower." "He did. But you can't keep a good goo down, can't ya?" "How can you talk, though? I thought—"

"You and Reed called me a parasite. My time in Peter gave me the gift of basic speech. This big breasted beauty gave me the gift of persuasion and strategy. Let's think together for a moment; ok, big man?", she gleefully asked. "I, I don't deal with terrorists—" "Do I look like some run-of-the-mill mall bomber to you?! I don't give a shit about this planet, I just hate Spider-Man! I know for a fact you do, too, Hank", she stated in an almost seductive manner, circling the glass with her left pointer finger/claw.

"Don't call me Hank like that, kid. I'm not ready to go to jail, especially because of you." "Like you really care about Janet like that. You want to hit her just like you want to hit some sense into Spider-Man. I want to do more than just smack some sense into him; a lot more. I want him dead."

"Dead? Yeah, he's a rotten and spoiled kid, but I don't know if he needs to die." "Who calls you Tiny more than anyone? Who made you look like a fool when he could cooperate with alien life peacefully, right when you said we were 'the enemy'? Who did those awful, embarrassing things to YOU?" "…Spider-Man." "That's right! Who made you hit Janet in front of all your Avengers teammates?" "S-Spider-Man did." "Ya damn right he did! Who made you go to Times Square and end up in this cell, huh? Was it Iron Man?" "No, it wasn't!" "Was it Thor, or Hulk, or Captain America?" "No! No they didn't!" "Then who did, Hank? Who made you end up sleeping in a jail cell above 5th Avenue, huh?" "Spider-Man!"

"That's right, Ant-Man! Spider-Man did all those things to you. He ruined your entire September. He did this to fully fuck with YOU AND YOU ALONE!" "He did! He thinks he's hot shit, and I oughtta send this spider down the water spout!", Hank bellowed in his hollow, near empty cell. "You can't, tho, Hank." "W-what? I'm Ant-Man, I can do whatever I want!" "You can't kill a fellow hero, Hank. Tell me, Hank, how well do you think heroes killing heroes is gonna look to the press, especially with your fists holding our hated enemy?" "…damnit, you're right. I'd start a whole Supers civil war with that. There are some Supers I wouldn't mind dying, though." "We don't need to get rid of every Super, Hank. We just need to squash the spider!"

"Right, I.. I can't lose focus here." "Correct. I want to kill the spider, and I know all of his secrets and greatest fears. You want to kill the spider, and you found a way to shrink anyone and anything. Give me the Pym Particles, and I'll break the boy's spirit first, making him easier to trigger a fight he'll lose to you, where I come in later for the killing bite." "Wait, 'killing bite'? You're gonna,… eat him?" "I need to eat, and I like my meals extra fresh", she replied, licking the glass with her long, pink, snake-like tongue, leaving green saliva sliding down the glass reflecting her yellowed teeth. "So, do we have a deal, Hank?" Hank, terrified and slightly turned on, took little time to finalize his decision. "No. Only I can use these Particles responsibly, and people from the press would catch on. I'm sorry, but you're gonna have to kill Spider-Man on your own, my not-so-little lady."

"You what?!", she shouted. "…you are an IDIOT! You useless, pathetic slithering SLIME!" She then punches the glass window with all her might, cracking the Hulk-proof window and setting off an alarm. The blaring siren triggered the goo's sensitive hearing, forcing it to flee and scatter like a rat family in a West Village restaurant. She swings back to Anna's, hoping to hide inside her and take time to plot in silence.

Back at the Avengers Mansion, Captain America and Dr Banner burst into Hank's private cell. "Who or what broke that damn glass, Hank?", interrogated Cap. "I don't know, I was asleep until that alarm rang! How many more times do I have to tell ya that, Steve?!" "I need to know the truth,—" "And you got it! Some mystery caused that there glass to crack, and I can't figure it out for the life of me right now!" "We'll talk about this in the morning. Keep an eye on anything that wants to finish what it started." "Will do, Boy Scout. Now lemme sleep for God's sake!"

**END OF CHAPTER 16**


	17. Chapter 17

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 17: Monday September 17th**

"Hey, guys!", Flash yelled from across the hallway, holding onto a piece of paper. "Whatcha got there, bro?", asks Peter. "Remember that homework you and MJ helped me out with? I already got a grade on it." "It's a zero, isn't it?", MJ slyly remarks. "Close. It's a perfect 100! You guys really helped me out a lot, thanks!" "Glad you can be taught. Now you gotta teach us how to be so happy", Randy butted in, grabbing MJ and Flash's shoulders. "How about tomorrow night, since I know you three got to prep with Mr Larsen's test?"

Suddenly, Peter's phone rings, as Aunt May's face lights up the screen. "Hey, May. Everything alright back at the house?" "Listen carefully, son, I expect you to rendezvous at your house from school immediately", orders Captain America. "Wait, what?!" "We need to talk to you about something that had occurred during Sunday morning, roughly around 12:45am. The sooner you arrive, the better. We'll handle the school paperwork for ya, just come now." "…ok, May, see ya soon." "My name's not May, it's Steve Rog—" He hangs up and rushes out of the hallways. "Pete, where ya headed?", Randy asks in a concerned manner. "Doctor's appointment May's picking me up almost late for it bye!", he yells without taking a single breath. "Your boyfriend's pretty weird", Flash adds. "I know, I know. We gotta fix that."

Inside a nearby bathroom stall, Peter Parker changes once more into The Amazing Spider-Man, swinging out of the public eye towards his home, where a stern Captain America awaits. After swinging around and finally reaching May's house, Cap stands ever so vigilantly on the front porch. "There you are, solider", greets Cap. "You have a pair of keys to let me in? I try not to break into houses that hold fellow Supers." 'Yeah, give me a sec. But quick question: why the hell did you call me on my aunt's number?!", Peter asks as he lets in Cap and locks the door from the inside.

"I used that number so you would definitely pick up, as this is urgent." "You could've just waited for me to, I don't know, LEAVE SCHOOL PROPERLY! I already got in enough trouble in school because of all the shit I had to deal with as an Avenger." "Ah, yes, the black goo that took over your body! That was quite the rough battle, solider." "Don't call me solider, Cap. Just tell me what was so urgent that I had to ditch my friends!" "Well, if you want to be direct, I have news regarding the goo." "…What kind of news?" "Take a seat, I'm not 100% sure you're going to like this. It's all on video, from last night at almost 1 in the morning."

Peter watches at first in confusion, trying to figure out why he's watching Ant-Man's mental breakdown. Soon after, he shudders as his Spider-Sense lightly tingles when the black silhouette appears. Once the not-so-mysterious creature talks, Peter's worst fear has become more than just a rude reality. "Oh good God, no. God no. No no no no no no no", he pants, jumping off the couch. "Son, take a deep breath. Tell me why you're stressed." "That, that… That can't be her. No, it can't have a memory, it doesn't even have a damn brain!"

"Did you say 'memory'? Peter, what does that mean?" "It has Mary Jane as its new body hotel, or host, or whatever you wanna call it! Cap, it's got my best friend and girlfriend!" "Good Lord, son! That is QUITE the debacle", Cap replies in honest shock. "Shame we can't help you with that, however." "What?" "We can't interfere as Avengers in solo heroic conflicts. It's inside the by-laws on page 42 of—" "You're shitting me, Captain."

"The fuck'd you just say to me, little boy?" "You and my former team before Hank went full on asshole mode got this damn goo on me, failed to rip it off of me, and now you can't even help me save an innocent life?!" "She's not innocent if she knows you're one of us, and I refuse to break protocol. That's what the Red Skull does, my boy! You don't want to be like the Red Skull now, do ya?" "Are you deadass telling me that an outdated piece of paper is gonna stop you from saving a life THAT YOU PUT IN THE GODDAMN DANGER?" "YOU DON'T SASS ME BOY!", Cap yells as he backhands Peter, showing the older, out-of-fashion ideals of his time before going into the icy waters.

"Jesus, what is it with you Avengers and hitting people? First Hank, and now you! They should call you guys The Abusers!" "If ya sass me, ya get the Brooklyn Backhand just like the Nazis back in '43." "Look, I have one real question for you. Just one. Why won't you, or Hank, or any of the other Avengers let me be an Avenger?" "…We do, Peter. We want you to be an Avenger, but you're not doing it the same way as us, so we do little things here and there to push you into the right direction." "You guys didn't do ANYTHING to make sure I was ok with the goo! You didn't keep MJ safe from it once I couldn't handle it anymore, and now you won't even try to get the goo off of MJ! How is any of this supposed to help me be an Avenger?!"

Running out of inspiring quotes, Cap reaches into his utility belt and frantically juggles flash cards, each containing quick quotes meant for an angry press meeting. "Well, I, I uh… I can't answer that, sir. Maybe Iron Man—" "Are those flash cards?" "N-no, Mr Jameson. I can't fully explain that—" "Jameson's dead, you dumb asshole!" Out of fear and stress, Cap sprints out of the living room and May's house.

Soon after the strange visit, Peter grabs his phone and calls MJ. "Hey, you still coming over to my place for the study group?", he asks in a slightly concerned way. "Yeah, you didn't need to call us for that." "Us? What do you mean 'us'?" "Hey, Pete!", Randy shouts in the background. "Did you finally get diagnosed with super nerd disorder?" "Did you finally learn to not butt into a couple's conversation?", MJ replies, walking a bit faster than Randy in the school hallways of seventh period. "Tiger, c'mon. We both know you got a grip on Calculus unlike anyone in Midtown High! Of course we're gonna be there."

"Right, we're smart and one of us is extra smart. I keep forgetting." "Yep. Also, I know you weren't getting picked up for a doctor's appointment." "Wait, what?" "Eddie Nunez did however, at fourth period, and the secretary escorted him out of the class. You got a call and dipped." "Well, I can't just say 'hey, Captain America called me in for an emergency meeting, see ya guys later'. That's shouting myself out when I don't need to." "Mhm-hm. I get you got your 'things', but you can't leave me every time something involving your little friends happens, especially that weird black goo thing."

Suddenly, Peter's Spider-Sense blared painfully, making him realize that goo really is inside her. "How'd you figure that out, smarty pants?", Peter replies, trying to play along with the goo's accidental exposure. "Isn't that goo thing your main problem right now, considering how much it hurt you?"

"I'd say Ant-Man is, but that's not your main concern. That's my responsibility, and I'll see you at my place. Bye." The goo, using MJ as its twisted vessel, cracks her phone in anger and contempt of Peter. "Damnit, Peter!", she mutters furiously. "Ya know what, I'll study on my own tonight. You two might need to work things out a bit more", Randy stutters, slowly walking away from MJ.

As the school day ends for Mary Jane, Peter's afternoon of alien exorcism begins as she walks into the Parker family living room. "Hey, Tiger! You got your notes out for tomorrow's test? I can't wait to figure out Algebra", she says, cockily walking in. "It's a Calculus test, MJ. Remember?", Peter replies, holding a boombox and glass jar. "That's right, it was Calculus! I got a little flustered there, Tiger. What's with the radio and jar? You gonna start a bluegrass band or something?" "I know the goo is inside you, MJ. Cap showed me the footage of you talking to Hank, trying to get him to kill me." "Now, Tiger, let's take a minute here and realize what you're saying! Isn't that a bit extreme?"

"No, Mary Jane. That goo is dangerous, and wants to use you for its own deeds. It's a poison, like a rattlesnake's venom. Get it out of you or I'm ripping it out of you." "You, you called me,… Venom?", the goo replied, with its sultry, sinister voice loudly making it clear who's in charge. "You don't know what that word even means! I wanted only to help you be a better hero, and you threw me away from a LOUD, LOUD BELL TOWER like garbage!" "You wanted to take over my life and disrespected Uncle Ben!" "We could've made him proud." "You wanted to use me till I died for what, some cruel and twisted form of justice?" "Hey, Peter! I'm back from the FEAST Charity interview, and I brought— What. Is. This?", May asks as she sees her nephew hold a threatening stance against MJ, also in a fighting stance.

"…don't call the Avengers or Fantastic Four, human", replies the goo in MJ's body. "Yeah, no, you're not Mary Jane. Peter, don't hurt her bye!", she says while slowly walking out, and then running on the street.

An impromptu Mexican standoff occurred between the young couple and the goo, as MJ took one small step backwards, nearing the open front door. Peter takes one step towards MJ, and MJ takes one more step back. She takes another step back, and Peter takes the next step towards her and the goo. Her arm then reaches towards the door, and Peter then web-shoots her towards the wall.

"No! You're not even in costume!" "You really think you can attack a Spider-Person in his own house and they wouldn't be prepared?"

"IT'S CLOBBERING TIME!", shouts a belligerent Ben Grimm, better known to the world as The Thing. "Where's the big bad goo at, ya punks?!" "It's in her", Peter replies while pointing at a struggling and webbed-up MJ. "In her?" "Yeah, exactly like how it was in me but it didn't look like it was in me. It's complicated." "Like a parasite in the early stages?" "…shit, that's it actually. Great analogy!" "Thanks, kid. C'mon, help me pick her up gently, I don't wanna break Wendy's over here." "Sure. You and Reed are gonna get it off of her safely, right?" "Yeah, when he's back from some funky science expo in Seattle. Don't worry, he'll land in JFK around 7, so Sue and me are gonna hold her in a real nice and comfy room."

"…I can't give her better care, so ok, I guess." "You alright, kid? I was expectin' some kind of Nickelodeon slime joke or two on my way here." "It's been a wild month, and I'm starting to get pretty tired of it", Peter replies, sighing solemnly.

**END OF CHAPTER 17**


	18. Chapter 18

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 18: Tuesday September 18th**

**9:30am, The Baxter Building. Manhattan.**

"So, lemme get this straight, Stretch", dryly states Ben. "You froze Red here in some weird awake but not awake status tube?" "Yeah." "You did this so that living goo doesn't control her, and possibly kill it off?" "Yeah." "And we gotta call her school so she don't get in trouble?" "Yeah. Anna asked we do the last one." "Of course that nice lady did; with her cute—" "BEN! I thought you and Alicia were going steady!", interrupts Sue, checking in on her husband. "Yeah, we are! That's obvious, and true, and all that stuff!"

"…anyway, I was explaining to Ben how Ms Watson is gonna be contained as I calculate the precise way we can safely remove the goo from her and not have it attempt to wake her up and escape. Sue, baby, you'll be ready when it's time, right?" "Yeah, of course, sweetie. The kids are at school now, so there's nothing for you to worry about." The plexiglass holding MJ then cracks as a black fist begins to repeatedly slam its way out.

"Ya gotta be kidding me. It's clobbering time, ain't it, Stretch?", asks an unsurprised Ben. "NO. It's containment time right now, DO NOT CLOBBER HER. She's still a child, there's only so much we can—" "Alright, but hey, that goo's planning to fight dirty. Ya know that, right?" "That's right, Stonehenge, Venom wants to play rough and dirty, just like the big girls do", replies the goo, now fully in control of MJ's body.

"Look, kid, I don't wanna hurt ya, and I know this is just—" "Just what? A puberty thing?", she asks, jumping out of the tube entrapping her. "This is more than a bad period, Fantastic Assholes. But this,… giant, heavy metal thing that no one told me what it does should hold ya down for a hot minute!" As the massive metal machinery flies towards the Richards and Ben, a random burst of fire melts a hole in it, giving the team a chance to easily split it. "No one calls the Fantastic Four a bunch of assholes unless I'm there to prove it!", shouts a fired-up Johnny Storm, launching a ring of fire around MJ. "Ay, the Baby Candle's back from his fancy schmancy time at Xavier's School!", joyously replies Ben.

"It's the anniversary of Jean's fourth death, so school's off today and I thought I'd pay a quick visit to my sister's place", replied Johnny. "Now, what in the name of God is THAT?!" "Spider-Man got a weird goo, and now his girlfriend has it. Now help me PLEASE find that big gun with four barrels!", frantically replies Reed, trying to find a nearby sonic cannon in reach. "…So, it's like, a living STD suit?" "I AM VENOM!", the goo hollers, hurling a chunk of the floor at Johnny.

"Venom?! Sounds like someone made their first edgy band name", Johnny adds, distracting her towards the window. "Flame-Brain, not there, we gotta keep her in the lab!" "Don't tell me how to do my job, Rocky! Besides, I can control some oil spill lady any day of the week." He failed to control her as she threw globs of the symbiote itself onto Johnny's fists, weighing down the flying fire.

"Believe me, hot-head, I'm not the one you control!", Venom yells. "If anything, I control YOU!" She slings more globs of herself at the Torch, and hops over to the opposite side of the lab with the grace of a rabid mountain lion, knocking down Ben like a stack of dominoes. "You suck at holding a bitch down, Reed. Hope Namor doesn't come here with a handful of flowers", Venom cackles maniacally, trying to rip open the vibranium doors. Reed, furious at Venom's taunts, launches a stretched-out arm like a cannon directly at her, accidentally punching her through the last crack in the vibranium door. Sue sprints towards the hole where the door was, trying to grab the runaway villainess with a force field.

"Where's the little ink blot?!", Johnny yells, transforming into a near-blinding supernova of rage and embarrassment, melting away the goo globs. "Reed, that little girl is gonna kill Peter, isn't she?", Sue asked, deeply concerned for the young couple's lives. "That goo will try, but I'll track it, and get some help while we're at it." "Whaddaya mean 'we'? Stretch, I ain't hitting kids", Ben replied. "You don't have to hurt her, you just have to rip the goo off her. Here's the plan."

**10:30am, Midtown High School. Astoria, Queens.**

Peter sits in his Chemistry desk chair, contemplating the last few questions of the first test. "If I heat GBD at 249c, should it implode, dissolve or melt into the container?", he reads to himself. "I know for a fact that DBG melts into the container, but only that, so that's wrong off the bat. It also doesn't really dissolve, only steams up. So implode it is."

Suddenly, the window broke as Venom burst into the classroom. "You! There you are, pretty boy. You're gonna help me find Spider-Man, Peter Parker", she states, slowly wall-crawling towards Peter. "M'am, who the hell are you?", asks Mr Larsen, furious at this destructive interruption. "Shut up, fool! The boy's coming with me, and he's coming right now!", she hissed back at him, grabbing Peter and flinging out of the classroom. She lands on the roof of the school, where no one can see them.

"MJ, what the fuck happened to you?!", asks a horrified Peter. "She's not awake yet,

Peter. But we can talk for her." "You ruined my life already, and now what? You wanna ruin hers too?" "WE want to improve the lives of both of you! We even have a deal—" "Tiger! Tiger, is that you?", asks the real MJ, poking her freckled face out from Venom's jaws.

"MJ! What did it do to you?" "What I did to her is the same thing I did to you, Penis Parker", Venom snarled at him. "I didn't scare her unlike you, however. Hear us out. We wanna make a deal that'll benefit the both of us." "There's nothing you can do that won't end with you in a jar!" "Not even a team-up?" "…talk very, very carefully."

"See, I know the two of you well enough to know what each of you want from one another. I know that she wants a life where Peter Parker and Spider-Man can love her as one. She's wanted a life with you since she could outpace you. I know you want a life with her no matter what. But neither of you two can find a middle ground where that can be achieved, at least not until now. I can swing around New York just as good as you, Peter, and I don't need any fancy manmade webbing to do it. Just a quick flick of the wrist, and BAM! Goo webs, all natural. Granted, I'll get the appetite of a horse or sleep like a rock after a good swinging session, but that's where Miss Thickness over here enters the scene. She eats, and she can't be stuck in between the two sides of her man, so why not swing by his side as an equal? I'll give her the powers and I'll give you the girl you've always wanted."

"That,… that's a real nice deal there. What's the catch, Poison?" "It's Venom, ya dip. No catch; just let me give her our powers on her command, and we'll give you the dream girl of dream girls." "It's latching onto my bones, and it's hurting me worse than Terry!" "W-wait, what's it doing to you?" "She's lying, let me swing by your side again, Tiger!", Venom replies, hiding her right hand behind her back, slashing MJ. "I'll give you ONE chance to think about my offer, Spider-Man", it states, throwing Peter into the school library. "When you've made up your mind, meet us where we had our first kiss, and yes, I mean the FIRST kiss between you and the meat sack." As the symboite scatters off to a mystery location, Spidey swings outside to think in peace.

**11am, 61st St, Woodside.**

"Although my Spider-Sense didn't go off, something about that deal is wrong", Peter thinks to himself, crouching on the top of a street pole. "I know that Venom goo wants nothing but to take over my life, and who knows what it'll do if that happened! It's not trustworthy, but maybe it and MJ can get together. Wait, MJ did say it was hurting her! Yeah no, I'm ripping it off of her on sight, actually. No one has the right to hurt others, and that thing has hurt too many people! It's due time someone took care of it for good!"

"Now, where am I gonna find MJ? It said to meet up where we had our first first kiss, but that could only mean,… Oh God no! Oh good God, no! There's too many people there, it'll fuck up any and everything in sight!", he sharply realizes, swinging onto the nearest 7 train.

**Shea Stadium, 10 years earlier.**

The Parker and Watson families cheer on the Mets as David Wright scores another home run against the Phillies on a brisk September afternoon. "Pete, did you see that? That was the cleanest home run I've ever seen!", exclaimed Ben Parker, trying to bond with his nephew. "Yeah, that was a real nice hit, but I was looking at something else for a minute", Peter replied. "Lemme guess, the guy three rows down wearing the Captain Picard jacket." "How'd ya know?" "You like Star Trek as much as I like a good coffee. Also, you told me about him three innings earlier."

"Oh. It's just such an awesome jacket, Uncle Ben! It's got the NCC-1701-D and everything." "You know what else has everything from The Next Generation?", asks a particularly shy MJ, firmly holding onto a bag of popcorn. "What?" "My Wii. Hooked it up with Netflix, and now we can watch Picard after Mario Kart!" "Sick! I can finally show you—" "You've shown me just about every episode they've ever made and cancelled. But it'll be awesome to see it again with you!"

Suddenly, the Jumbo-Tron shows a flurry of hearts scatter across the screen, with pop music blasting out of the speakers. "Ben, betcha five bucks they put that kiss cam on the old vet couple we bumped into on the way in", Terry whispers. "Betcha ten bucks it'll be on you and Anna, if ya keep talking that hot shit", May sassily replies. "Tiger, it's the kiss cam! Who do you, uh, who do you think is gonna get on it?", a blushing MJ asks, choking on her words.

"It'll probably be some rowdy bleacher couple or something", Peter replies, grabbing a kernel or two. "Hold up", Ben interrupts, grabbing his nephew for an impromptu man-to-man talk. "Pete, remember a couple weeks ago when I said there are certain ways a man talks to a young lady?" "Yeah, but MJ isn't my girlfriend—" "When a girl asks who's gonna get a kiss, the answer is always her." "Uncle Ben,—" "The answer is always her. Trust me, May taught me that one the hard way."

"MJ, I got another idea who might get on the kiss cam", Peter says, slightly confused from Ben's quick lesson. "Who?" "It might be someone in this row; someone close to the staircase, like you!" Suddenly, the young children see giant reflections of themselves, broadcast in front of thousands of people. MJ bashfully grabs Pete's hand, and lands a quick peck on his lips. "You're the best friend a girl could ask for, getting the kiss cam to be right on us!", gleefully claims MJ, hugging Peter so tight he taps her back for some air.

**11:30am, The Citi Field Right Field Lighting Rig. Now.**

"I can't believe he's gonna fall for that bullshit offer! Jesus, our boy is so gullible, ain't he?", a separated Venom asks MJ. "He is NOT your boy, since you tried to ruin and consume his life." "I did not!", it snarled. "Ya did, and you made Peter uppercut Flash down three blocks!" "He lived. He lived, didn't he?" "Yes, but you're a damn alien goo monster! Why am I even arguing with you, you discount Flubber?!" "Don't you dare insult me, meat bag, before I really make you the bag of meat you always were!"

"Are ya sure about that, you talking oil spill?", adds Spider-Man, confidently hanging upside down from a light. "Last time I checked, Mrs Met wasn't trying to kill her man with help from evil aliens!" "You thought long and hard about our offer, Pe—" "It's not happening. Let MJ go, get in a Snapple bottle, and I'll put you away somewhere safe. How's that for an offer?" "So we're gonna have to kick your sorry ass the hard way, then, instead of slowly doing it throughout years of shitting on ya? Fine, we'll do this the fun way", Venom replies, bonding once more with MJ.

"Ya know what? I got a better idea, Arachna-Lad. Batting practice's about to start soon, and I can smell some fresh blood with cameras; lots of cameras. Look, there they are now!" The goo begins leaping off the rigs and onto the bleachers, slobbering with joy and hunger towards the unaware press. "No! No more games! You're going back in the jar, and THAT'S IT!", Spidey shouts, webbing Venom's back in a last-minute effort to bring it away from the press.

As Venom feels Peter's webs grip it, she spins around and flings him into the right field. "Why won't you let me kill you, Spider?", Venom snarls. "I'm just a very, very hungry girl and you're one hell of a snack!" "Can't you just go eat rats or ya know, some other planet full of protein?!" "Not when I can swing around New York better than you", she replies, now crawling towards a Mets batboy. "Are you kidding me, Jabberjaw? You stole my powers, and now you wanna take some young lady's life for what?! So you can do it again and again until you can't find a new body to drain?!", Peter hollers, furious at his former suit finally showing its whole, animalistic, cruel self.

"Get the camera on right field yesterday, kid. Eddie Brock's about to finally tackle a Super story as it's breaking!", barks a muscular, blonde, naive DBTV reporter as he runs off to the fight of the web spinners. "Jesus, Brock, look at them!", exclaims the young cameraperson. "You wanna do that—" "Yes, I'm tired of fucking around with these meathead sports guys, and here's the perfect chance to make it big as a Supers guy. Brant'll love this shit!" As he combs his slightly frazzled post-run hair, a chunk of the right field meant for Spider-Man slams into Brock's back.

"Yum, fresh meat!", screeches Venom, leap-frogging over Peter's head towards a weakened Brock. "Howdy, big boy. You wanna give a pretty girl like me the interview of ya life?", she slobbers to a very confused, hurt Brock, licking her tongue across her cheeks and teeth. "Hey, we ain't done yet!", shouts Spidey, webbing her away from the out-of-his-league reporter. "Sorry about that,… Brad, is it?" "It's Brock; Eddie Brock! I'm with DBTV, and ya mind giving me a SUPER QUICK info drop on big, black, scary lady here?" "Venom here is evil, that's OH SHIT GET OUT OF THE WAY!", he claims, shoving him towards first base, failing to remember how his super strength affects the normal citizen.

"Let me kill you, Spider-Man! How hard can that be, damnit?!", bellowed Venom. A crunched over Brock, currently howling in pain, is ignored by even his own cameraperson as many other members of the press stampede towards the surprisingly contained fight. "BuzzFeed Pop storyteller Chris Kent here!" "Gail Grossman here, giving our NY1 viewers a close up experience.." "Bobby Richardson on the scene.." "Only Stevie DiCarli can give you THIS!" "Man, Mrs Met looks SCARY, doesn't she, folks?" As Peter and Venom slash, dash and dodge each other's attacks, the added stress begins to get to Spidey as the Spider-Sense blares like a nuclear alarm, valiantly trying to save each press person and their cameramen.

"That's MY STORY, ya damn culture vultures!", shouts a limping Eddie, desperately attempting to regain his story. "Camera operator, get them outta here!… Camera guy?" Eddie's young companion left, leaving behind a broken Canon product, riddled with footprints and a couple of press badges. "…Fine, I'll do it myself", he mutters to himself, opening up his phone's camera app.

"Can anyone here NOT a superhero get out of here right now, PLEASE! She'll eat you alive!", demands a stressed Spidey. "Boy, I'll eat her alive if you know what I mean", lewdly replies a New York Post reporter just before getting their hand bitten off. Enraged for multiple reasons at this point in the fight, Peter finally leaps at Venom and throws his first punch at it, as reporters flee for their lives and the lives of their crew. "Get! Off! Of! Mary! Jane! NOW!", Peter cries with a choked crack in his voice, dropping fist after fist after fist into the bloody jaws of this creature like a WW2 air raid bomber plane.

"Tiger, wait! Tiger, it's me! Calm down, please; you're hurting me!", begs a weakened Venom, revealing his best friend's face hiding within its broken teeth. "M-m-MJ? MJ, I'm hurting you? I… I'm trying to save you", stutters a newly traumatized Peter. "I'm just trying to save you, I never want to hurt you, MJ." As Peter stops dead in his tracks, the symbiote slides off of MJ, slithering towards Peter's spine. "J-Just tell me you're OK, I won't treat you like Terry, OK? Tell me you're—" Venom spears itself into Peter's spinal column, sliding and slicing up his insides as well as his suit, hoping to let Peter die from bleeding out.

"Stupid boy. Stupid, stupid boy. If I want to eat you and do it again and again until the heat death of the universe, you say YES!", hisses Venom. "N, n… Not if you're gonna hurt innocent people", Peter states, coughing blood. "When you have the power to help someone,(cough)that power comes with the responsibility to help the best way you can. I learned that lesson a long time ago, and(cough) I learned it again not too long ago in the hardest way ever." "Bleh, again with this shit." "I can't forget that lesson, along with a new one; don't ever let the Spider go before the Man for Spider-Man, Flubber." "That's it? That's all ya got?! You can't even think of a good dying phrase? Pathetic", Venom dryly belittles as it reaches towards MJ, hoping to bond one last time for the killing blow. "Wait, where are ya, ya top-heavy bitch?"

MJ slams Venom's head with the broken camera, startling but not harming the alien goo. "Go fuck off already, you big sticky asshole!", she hollers, not realizing her attack did nothing to hurt this benign being. The goo lashes out a primal scream of dominance over Ms Watson, as MJ follows suit. Seeing this through blurred and bloodied vision, Peter has an idea; a loud idea. He immediately swings off towards the Jumbo-Tron, wall crawling to the lights faster than he's ever wall crawled anywhere before. Venom sees its favorite prey run away, and slithers in pursuit of Peter.

"Why do you run from the sweet release of death, baby-cakes? If I can't swing alongside you before eating you, then I'll just eat you! Accept it, and I'll eat you quickly, so you don't feel it as severe", the goo bargains, gaining up on a broken, tattered Peter. "N-No. You hurt me, made me hurt others and now,… you hurt MJ? And you think you can just keep doing that? No. No, you can't." Peter, now on top of the Jumbo-Tron, rips off two metal pipes and slams them together. The harsh, shrill ringing of the tin cylinders stop Venom dead in its tracks, howling in pain. Peter slams the sticks together again, this time slowly walking back down to the outfield, further weakening the unearthly beast. The more Peter plays the pipes, more of the once gooey, slimy drops of Venom harden and fall off as dry, brittle remnants of a once powerful monster.

As Peter now stands tall and triumphant over the literal slime ball left of Venom on the right outfield, he puts the pipes gently onto the grass. "I could play that tune one more time, I could forever end your dumbassery, and I could save God knows how many lives. But I won't. I'm gonna let you live, so you can think about what you did. You're a living, thinking creature, and you're gonna change your ways, maybe learn some responsibility along the way", Peter states, now fully exhausted. As he falls to the soft, earthy ground, no longer capable of holding himself up, MJ swoops in and traps the goo inside a large soda cup.

"Thank God I got that fight footage", contemplates Eddie, hiding inside the grand stand seats. "The whole world is gonna know Eddie Brock and Spider-Man reports go together like bacon and eggs!"

**End of Chapter 18**


	19. Chapter 19

**The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility**

**Chapter 19: Wednesday September 19th**

Peter, lying down in a strange bed, starts to wake up in a white room with a small coffee table to his right. "Hello, Peter. You're finally awake after a long resting period", calmly informs a smooth, non-binary voice. "…Please tell me I'm not in a Supers hospital or some kind of weird ER room", Peter groggily replies. "You are currently in the Baxter Building's bio-healing quarters." "Damnit. Lemme guess, all the Avengers are gonna come in and try to make me one of them again."

"How can such a smart kid end up in a place like this?", asks a bodiless voice; a voice that sounds all too flexible and familiar. "Reed?" "Yeah, and I brought some friends along with me. Real friends, no suits." "Hiya, Tiger", MJ butts in, holding a plate of wheat cakes. "Wheat cakes! Nice, I'll eat that cake of yours!" "What?" "…I'm still just getting up." "Tiger, ever since I came back to Queens, there's a lot that changed, especially with you." "I don't know if now's the best time for that, there's some things we need to dis—" "Reed, let us talk to him", interrupts May, bringing in an extra chair for herself. "I thought you were gonna wait until—" "Not this time. I know what she's gonna say to him." "Well, it's time to go check on my experiments now."

"MJ, May, wha's going on?" "…It's a lot in such a short time. I had to deal with 4 legit super villains who have no problems with murder, two of them personally tried to kill me personally! Peter, when should a girl have an alien slime become you and use her body to kill her boyfriend?!" "When, Peter Benjamin Parker?!" "None?", he nervously states, with a mouthful of pancakes. "YA DAMN RIGHT YOU NEVER DO THAT!" "Look, I don't like almost dying and being possessed. I hate it, I hate it beyond comprehension. It's the worst feeling anyone can ever go through, and I would never go through it if I haven't met you."

"Are,... Are you breaking up with me, MJ?", stutters a very confused Peter. "Take a minute to listen, please. That's why May whipped up the wheat cakes." "Alright, I'll shut up and let you finish", he replies, still chewing on his homemade breakfast. "What are trying to say to me?" "Peter, I, I..." MJ freezes mid sentence, contemplating exactly what her next words will be to the man she's loved since he was a boy. "MJ, you ARE breaking up with me!", shouts Peter, with May starting to comfort her baby boy. "It's all because of these damn powers! They took away Ben, Gwen, Uncle Norman, Harry,-" "Tiger, it's not that at all!" "Wait, what?!", the Parkers reply in unison. "Mary Jane, you told me this was the 'we're no longer boyfriend and girlfriend' trip. Just what kind of games do you think you can play with my Peter, after all these years of friendship and acceptance we gave you on top of thirds and fourths-"

"I'm not finished. I can't be your girlfriend, and that's true. That's no longer an option. I know what is an option, though." "W-wha-ya know what, just tell me. I don't understand any of this AT ALL." "If I can't be your girlfriend, I gotta upgrade to ya forever and ever lover! The silk to your spider's web, the spinneret in those genius shooters on ya wrists!" "... So, you're not gonna make him cry like he did in July over Gwen?" "May, c'mon!", Peter bashfully berates in such a short sentence. "Sorry, my Aunt Senses were tingling." As Pete's face flushes with embarrassment, MJ giggles at the corny joke.

"Tiger, I can't let Spider-Man mope around Midtown if you did everything to make me feel just as special as you; albeit some goo got in the fucking way." "Language! You're still not 18 yet, little lady." "But you get the idea, Pete. If I'm gonna love and support Peter Parker, I gotta give Spider-Man the same treatment. Just give me some shooters of my own for emergencies, since I'm **never** gonna get the suit at this rate.-"W-well, that's something you can blame Reed on-" "AND teach me how to make my own webbing; I kinda forgot how from when you told me way back when."

"Peter Benjamin Parker, say yes. I know Ben would've told you to", May whispers into Peter's ear. "Where else are you gonna find a girl like this?" "Well, this is a lot to handle all at once." "It's almost like finding out your loved one's a superhero!", sarcastically replies MJ, starting to get impatient with Peter's indecisiveness. "Are you gonna—" "Yes. Yes, let's swing around New York together, Spinerette!" "Spinerette…?" "Yeah, that's your swinging name. You said it yourself, MJ."

"Yeah, I did. Just like I said I'd eat you if I couldn't swing with you", MJ adds, this time with a much deeper, monstrous voice with her face immediately morphing into Venom's. "You got any room for party crashers, Shark Week?", asks Harry Osborn, still in his prison jumpsuit. "W-w-What?", stutters Peter. "No no no no no, this isn't real!" "Wanna bet, Bug Boy?", bellows Norman Osborn, fully garbed in the Green Goblin's mask, purple unitard and satchel from behind Peter's bed. Sandman reveals himself to be the coffee table, guffawing at Spider-Man's absolute terror.

A horribly disfigured hand missing some fingers reaches from underneath the bed, pulling Peter out and gave him a mirror amidst the evil laughs. The Chameleon's devious grin became Peter's reflection, now cackling like a drunk hyena at Pete's extreme confusion. The broken hand turned into an arm, and that turned into the torso and full body of Kraven, The Hunter, putting a shotgun barrel on his forehead. As the maniacal cacklings and guffaws of Peter's old enemies flood the room, the mirror handle stretched and thickened as it formed a tentacle; a perfect device to choke out Spider-Man. "I'll be back, sooner than you'll ever expect", it coldly claimed, tightening its grip on Peter's windpipe. "It's all according to my master plan."

"NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!", shrieked Peter, fending off a non-existent threat. "No! No more! You're dead or in jail, each and every one of you! You can't hurt me, you can't hurt anyone!", he ranted on, not realizing he's on May's couch and scaring everyone. "You can't hurt,... You,... Wait, why am I back home? Where's Venom, and Harry? Sandman? Norman?! Otto?! Where are they?!"

"Peter, calm down, take a VERY deep breath, ok?", replies Reed, rushing in through the kitchen table. "You're home now. No one's gonna hurt you here. You're safe here", May adds, holding her boy tight. "May, Reed; did I win? Did I get rid of Venom?" "You and MJ did, it's already in a rigged containment can. It won't get anyone now, I'm 100% positive of that." "Where is it? Tell me it's not back in the-" "It's not back in the Baxter Building, but I'm legally not allowed to tell you where it really is", Reed chimed in, already prepared. "So we're safe? Everyone's safe?" "YES, Pete. Me and MJ are gonna be fine. We're gonna be okay", May replies, giving Peter a cup of orange juice.

"Now get dressed and brush your teeth. I made you a bread sandwich, since Flash's mom wasn't kidding about us paying his med bills. Lunch's on the counter, and try to swing extra fast, if you can time it or if your little Spider's Sense does it for you. Or do you, I'm not sure honestly? How do ya time it-" "May! What time is it?", Peter interrupts, covering Reed's mouth before he makes another Adventure Time joke.

"It'ssssss 8am on the dot, better get a move on! Ya got like 20 minutes before where you should be THE WHOLE DAY. No patrolling, I want you to rest those wounds." " Fine, I'll come straight home", Peter begrudgingly agrees. "Hold up, I got an idea. Did Johnny ever give you a joyride in the Fantasicar?"

**8:15am, Midtown High School entrance.**

"Reed, I owe ya one for this! But how are you gonna handle-" "Me and the principal go back. I was his dad's tutor way before I borrowed that space shuttle without permission", he calmly replies, strutting into the front office. "Plus, what problem can't Mr Fantastic fix? Now go to class, someone's probably expecting you there." An anxious Peter runs off to his first period class, still hoping his lucid nightmare doesn't become a firm reality.

"Hey, did I miss anything?", Peter asked, sliding quietly into his desk next to Randy and MJ. "Bro, class hasn't even started yet. Yo got your copy of the group essay outline?", Randy replies. "…Shit. That's either in this bag orrrrr nope it's on my bed because I'm a genius who's always responsible with his life!" "Of course. Ya too busy swinging around the city and fucking super-villains to do your report?" "YA WHAT?", Peter and MJ both yell-whisper.

"C'mon, man, Dad taught me all his reporter tricks so I could be a Bugle boy just like him. I seen how you hold back in PE, you of all people just happened to get kidnapped by a super villain, who looks like a thick female version of Spider-Man's dark edge lord suit which was worn THE EXACT SAME TIME you were being a huge dick, and MJ was coincidentally absent the day that thick ass villain showed up. My nigga, are you even** trying** to hide this shit?"

"…It was that tight on me?", asks MJ. "Yeah. I know that fine ass anywhere." "What'd you mean 'that fine ass'?" "I look, but never touch out of respect." "Thank you…?" "Thank you, but please stop. Unless it's right in your face, just don't", MJ replies. "If you say so. Anyway, you left it in your bed?"

"You three care to share your discussion with the rest of the class? It seems so riveting since you haven't stopped during my role call", interrupts Mr Bagley. "Just uh, just making Peter has a clear understanding on the project, sir." As Mr Bagley's role call turns into his lesson plan, Peter leans into Randy's ear. "You can't tell anyone, no matter what happens to any of us. Only the other supers know, and that's how it's gonna stay", he whispered. "Like I'm gonna tell anyone, Dad also taught me about NDAs", he sarcastically replied.

**3:30pm, The DBTV Editor's Floor.**

"You're fired, Brock! How many times do I have to shout it so it goes through ya damn head?!", hollers Betty Brant. "I can't be fired, Betty! Who got you the scoop on Ant-Man's domestic abuse, huh?" "Reed Richards. He dropped that info to me PERSONALLY two days ago." "Well,… I have better info, ya know." "So you not only embarrass us on camera, right after Jonah's passing, but now you're reading my mail as well?" "I, I uhh, I can explain. You see, it was in my mailbox, and—" "You're only giving me more reasons to kick your sorry ass outta here!"

"I did what I had to do to get that story!" "You got us footage of a fight other people IN THE FIELD got better footage of. Get out before I throw you out the window." "You're a LIAR, Brant! A LIAR!" "Hey, Ben, you said that a Mr Cage would be talking with you today in office, right?", Brant politely yet firmly asked through her intercom phone. "Yep, he's grabbing a cup of coffee real quick before we start", Ben replies. "Cool, send him over here before you two get started, please." "Yeah, sure." "Thank you!"

"…Please tell me Mr Cage isn't a hero for hire." "Oh, he is, smart ass. Better sprint out or get powered out, man." "…We'll see how the New York Bulletin reacts to how I've been treated by a control freak like you! We'll see, you'll see, you'll all see!", Brock hollers as he storms out of her office, swinging his arms around like a wild monkey before Luke Cage throws him into the elevator.

**END OF CHAPTER 19**


	20. Epilogue

**EPILOGUE**

**10:30pm, Le Barman Mordant. Downtown Paris. **

"So, if everything is to be fully understood, you two want an audience with Lord Von Doom?", asks a shady, bearded man slouching inside an even shadier pub booth."My great Lord and Savior Von Doom?" "Yes, God damnit!", replies a bitter, impatient Harry Osborn, slamming the table furiously. "How many times do we have to—" "Patience, boy, patience", interrupts Otto Octavius, quietly sliding his upper left tentacle on the boy's shoulder to remind him of where he is. "Yes, we've stated this multiple times already, my good sir. The both of us have a reputation amongst the American Supers community that proves we deserve one moment with Lord Doom."

The sleazy pub, once minding their own nefarious business, swiftly turns their attention towards the three gentlemen inside the booth second to the far left wall. "So you are indeed Dr Octopus and the Green Goblin's son, no?", interrogated the bulky, jaded, elderly barkeep. "Who would ever be interested in meeting someone so low-level and unimportant as Dr Octopus and the baby goblin?", Otto mockingly replies, staring directly into the negotiator's eyes.

"Come to our back alley tomorrow at noon; we may have an offer that would intrigue men like you", the barkeep tells Otto via a telepathic wavelength. "I think in all honestly, sir, if you won't let us talk with your king, perhaps others have more persuasive methods of entering his halls." "What did he say?" "Who?" "The barkeep. He's a mutant, isn't he? Using his powers for Yankees like you!"

"We might be Yankees, but at least we know a shit dealmaker when we see it", Harry adds, spitting in the middle man's drink before leaving the booth on Otto's orders. Furious with Harry and Otto's persistence, the middle man pulls out a modified six-shooter, capable of blasting shotgun shells. Before he can pull the trigger, nearby patrons dog pile him as the two Spider-Man foes walk out unharmed. "Was the spit really that necessary, Osborn?" "No, but it made sure that Latverian asshole knew who he was fucking with!", he replies in glee, giggling at his disrespect.

"You sound just like your father. We'll refine that part of you soon enough", Otto dryly states, swiftly grabbing him as he starts his climb amongst the Parisian skyline with grace and power. "Why do we gotta fix my awesomeness when it works? That whole pub was on OUR side!" "They were on MY side, because I do something you can't do." "Cosplay a plate of calamari?" "No", Otto replies while lightly slapping the back of Harry's head.

"I command fear and respect sincerely. You demand attention and roughhousing, like a puppy! I will make you feared and respectable, much like a trained German shepherd." "Can you, though? Your fear and respect hasn't brought us any good crew members yet, Mr Master Planner!" "That's because I brought you along to get the one-off henchmen." "What? I haven't been in a different room as you unless I had to shit." "Allow me to introduce you to our REAL team", Otto replies, with his top right tentacle showing off a silhouette of criminals and villains of the past ready for a new future with Doctor Octopus and The Hob Goblin.

**THE END OF SPIDER-MAN…?**


End file.
